Lesley Funny Status Messages



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   messageicon Alright, Captain Morgan, I'll make you a deal....I'll stop drinking when you put your foot down.
←Rate | 11-27-2010 17:04 by Lesley Comments (1)  


   messageicon I have a lot of people in my phone with the last name "FromTheBar".
←Rate | 12-28-2010 14:26 by Lesley Comments (0)  


   messageicon I'm no genius, but I am smart enough to know that there is no ''x'' in the words ''especially'', ''espresso'', or ''ask''.
←Rate | 11-18-2010 11:11 by Lesley Comments (0)  


   messageicon I just googled the word ''anagram'' and it said, ''Did you mean: nag a ram?'' Well played, Google. Well played.
←Rate | 11-19-2010 13:36 by Lesley Comments (2)  


   messageicon Wow, I have a lot of people named "Do Not Answer" in my phone...
←Rate | 12-28-2010 14:17 by Lesley Comments (0)  


   messageicon Dear future politicians, If one of you promises to synchronize a few traffic signals around here, you'll get my vote. Sincerely, Taxpayer #317.
←Rate | 11-24-2010 03:45 by Lesley Comments (0)  


   messageicon Parachute for sale. Used once. Never opened. Small stain.
←Rate | 11-18-2010 04:11 by Lesley Comments (0)  


   messageicon Sarah Palin has a new reality TV show. Now all she has to do is enter reality.
←Rate | 11-30-2010 00:26 by Lesley Comments (0)  


   messageicon I love Beer. I would marry Beer if I could. ''Do you, Beer, take me to be your awfully wetted wife....until a DUI do us part? I LOVE YOU, BEER!"
←Rate | 11-27-2010 17:01 by Lesley Comments (0)  


   messageicon If the best part of waking up is Folgers in my cup, I don't think I wanna wake up.
←Rate | 11-19-2010 08:48 by Lesley Comments (0)  


   messageicon Dear people: Stop drunk texting. Sincerely, Cell Phone Companies
←Rate | 03-13-2011 22:15 by Lesley Comments (0)  


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