Indy Dave Funny Status Messages



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   messageicon Its so hot I used my blow dryer as a cooling fan!
←Rate | 07-04-2012 15:50 by Indy Dave Comments (0)  


   messageicon Bruce and Kris Jenner officially file for divorce today. Or as most see it, the next step in Bruce's sex change. He is probably already wearing capri pants by now.
←Rate | 09-22-2014 21:43 by indy dave Comments (0)  


   messageicon We need naked bitstrip cartoon people if this is going to work. Just my opinion.
←Rate | 10-25-2013 08:10 by Indy Dave Comments (0)  


   messageicon I love the phrase "boobie trapped" I mean, who doesn't like to be trapped by boobies????
←Rate | 07-30-2013 16:12 by Indy Dave Comments (0)  


   messageicon Ben Roethlisberger was just on an NFL commercial saying what he was thankful for. He forgot to mention not being charged or found guilty of sexual assault. twice.
←Rate | 11-28-2013 21:24 by indy dave Comments (0)  


   messageicon If I win the Powerball, I'm gonna buy Bruce Jenner and turn him back into a man. Just for fun.
←Rate | 02-11-2015 20:20 by Indy Dave Comments (0)  


   messageicon day 5 - I am thankful for vaginas
←Rate | 11-05-2013 12:59 by Indy Dave Comments (0)  


   messageicon I bought some sparkly wrapping paper thinking it was like a simulated sparkly kind. It is actually made out of sparkles. Well, now my floor, face, hands, clothes and kid look like Diamond Cherry Serenity & Candi came over to my house after the strip club.
←Rate | 11-27-2013 14:27 by indy dave Comments (0)  


   messageicon we have some potentially severe weather headed our way this evening. please make sure you have your emergency kit: alcohol, lube, porn, blow up girlfriend, pain pills, heroin and a football helmet. Stay safe my friends!
←Rate | 06-12-2013 19:02 by indy dave Comments (0)  


   messageicon Anthony Weiner is still sexting... really, who cares??? However, if my last name were weiner and I had a son, I totally would have named him "Gigantic"
←Rate | 07-23-2013 19:29 by Indy Dave Comments (0)  


   messageicon I don't know if anyone ever does anything as much as LL Cool J licks his lips.
←Rate | 01-12-2014 19:16 by Indy Dave Comments (0)  


   messageicon Fun Fact of the Day: Of the 236 episodes of the great show "Friends" Jennifer Aniston has 'pokies' in 217 of them.
←Rate | 04-01-2012 11:24 by Indy Dave Comments (0)  


   messageicon I bet midgets are very busy this time of year... with all of the elf jobs and such...
←Rate | 11-30-2011 23:00 by Indy Dave Comments (0)  


   messageicon The thermometer on my cars says, "FU_____CK YOU!"
←Rate | 01-06-2014 11:29 by Indy Dave Comments (0)  


   messageicon Pro life tip:I've found the best way to avoid my life ending from a police officer is to not break the law.If I do break the law, then I comply with their authority.If I do not agree with their authority I surrender and allow due process with an attorney.
←Rate | 12-03-2014 20:59 by indy dave Comments (2)  


   messageicon Taken 27 coming to theaters in January 2029.
←Rate | 12-27-2014 17:57 by indy dave Comments (0)  


   messageicon I think the Oscars would be a lot more interesting if they had a "Best Nip Slip" category... or "Best Back Burger."
←Rate | 03-02-2014 21:44 by indy dave Comments (0)  


   messageicon Fort Hood suffers tradegy again. Perhaps they should change it to Fort Suburbs.
←Rate | 04-02-2014 22:44 by indy dave Comments (0)  


   messageicon I don't want to brag but I was the best Nintendo game blower in history.
←Rate | 09-12-2014 19:42 by indy dave Comments (0)  


   messageicon sometimes if there is a cute girl at the register, I'll purposely purchase a "magnum" when I check out. BOOM!
←Rate | 06-06-2013 22:43 by indy dave Comments (0)  


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