snotty Funny Status Messages



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   messageicon Somehow,, We've got to find a way to STOP the driver of that bus that everyone keeps getting thrown under.
←Rate | 02-19-2013 07:40 by snotty Comments (0)  


   messageicon Any amusement you may have experienced from my past posts are in no way a guarantee of future performance.... Please initial here and sign here.
←Rate | 04-08-2013 08:54 by snotty Comments (0)  


   messageicon Glad to hear we've all been picked up for another season.
←Rate | 12-22-2012 07:32 by snotty Comments (0)  


   messageicon We should hang out and stare at our phones.
←Rate | 04-20-2012 17:06 by snotty Comments (0)  


   messageicon I Saw a Vespa crash into a Toyota Prius today...... There was glitter everywhere.
←Rate | 04-28-2012 19:25 by snotty Comments (0)  


   messageicon NEWS FLASH: Scientists still baffled by Canadians' ability to watch movies, own guns, and play video games,,, but not shoot each other.
←Rate | 12-19-2012 08:13 by snotty Comments (1)  


   messageicon This woman at Walmart has a lovely set of March Madness teeth.. She's down to the final 4.
←Rate | 03-13-2012 19:10 by snotty Comments (0)  


   messageicon I'm just saying it might be a good idea for Liam Neeson's to take his family members to the vets and get them microchipped.
←Rate | 01-16-2015 08:34 by snotty Comments (0)  


   messageicon PRO TIP: If you post a pic of the temperature in your car on Facebook the University of Phoenix will email you a Meteorology degree.
←Rate | 03-25-2015 13:08 by snotty Comments (0)  


   messageicon The brownies I started making in my Easy Bake Oven in 1987 are ready if you guys want one.
←Rate | 11-18-2015 17:43 by snotty Comments (0)  


   messageicon Lord Almighty, Adele...REALLY ?,, Just burn his house down & get on with your life already.
←Rate | 04-02-2012 07:49 by snotty Comments (0)  


   messageicon According to my current parking spot I'm a physician
←Rate | 05-18-2013 18:58 by snotty Comments (0)  


   messageicon Every meal I didn't have to cook myself,, is the best meal I've ever had.
←Rate | 03-22-2012 20:35 by snotty Comments (0)  


   messageicon I could really use one of those Chris Farley,, 'down by the river',, speeches right about now...
←Rate | 06-04-2012 20:49 by snotty Comments (0)  


   messageicon If a tree falls in a forest and no one is around,,, Will the entire tree still be used to print a single CVS receipt?
←Rate | 04-03-2014 19:00 by snotty Comments (0)  


   messageicon Top Gun was so unrealistic,,, Everyone knows Tom Cruise can't reach the clutch on a motorcycle.
←Rate | 11-18-2013 07:56 by snotty Comments (0)  


   messageicon Pretty sure I look forward to my boss' vacation's more than he does.
←Rate | 07-24-2013 19:45 by snotty Comments (0)  


   messageicon Hope I never go to jail,, because I haven't memorized a phone number since 2003.
←Rate | 03-23-2013 22:17 by snotty Comments (0)  


   messageicon Peanut butter sandwiches taste better when cut in half diagonally...........Listen,, I don't make the rules people.
←Rate | 05-10-2012 08:34 by snotty Comments (0)  


   messageicon Just found out I got another A in my daughter's science class.
←Rate | 10-04-2013 07:53 by snotty Comments (0)  



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