bego Funny Status Messages



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   messageicon You know you're lazy when you get excited about cancelled plans
←Rate | 10-01-2012 22:36 by BEGO Comments (0)  


   messageicon Let's have a round of applause for the heroes that they think they can save all the cancer-ridden children by liking and sharing those Facebook statuses.
←Rate | 02-23-2013 10:59 by BEGO Comments (0)  


   messageicon Why do people in movies keep all their lights off when they hear a noise? I’d be lighting that place up like friggin’ Times Square.
←Rate | 08-30-2013 23:07 by BEGO Comments (0)  


   messageicon Life gets a lot easier once you decide to become part of the problem.
←Rate | 08-02-2011 21:39 by BEGO Comments (0)  


   messageicon I don't know why beer companies bother with an expiration date... it's never going to make it anywhere near that.
←Rate | 06-13-2012 22:41 by BEGO Comments (0)  


   messageicon How the heck does one cup of coffee equal one gallon of pee!?!?
←Rate | 06-27-2012 22:08 by BEGO Comments (0)  


   messageicon The best part of being single is that you always get to be right.
←Rate | 04-04-2012 21:24 by BEGO Comments (0)  


   messageicon I don't know exactly who's health I'm drinking to, but they're going to be immortal at this rate
←Rate | 04-23-2012 21:24 by BEGO Comments (0)  


   messageicon Hey, if you stay really quiet and listen very, very closely, You can hear the beautiful sound of you shutting the f$ck up.
←Rate | 05-14-2012 21:11 by BEGO Comments (0)  


   messageicon The week seems to go by at the speed of a snail. Unless it's the weekend. Then the snail is driving a Ferrari.
←Rate | 06-11-2012 22:09 by BEGO Comments (0)  


   messageicon My brain is about as organized as the WalMart $5 DVD bin.
←Rate | 07-01-2012 22:17 by BEGO Comments (0)  


   messageicon I have no idea how I use to get around in the dark before I had a cell phone.
←Rate | 01-18-2013 21:17 by BEGO Comments (0)  


   messageicon I miss being able to slam my phone shut when I hang up on somebody. Violently pressing "end call" just doesn't do it for me.
←Rate | 09-20-2012 21:45 by BEGO Comments (0)  


   messageicon I hate mosquitoes!!! I mean, I know I'm delicious but damn...
←Rate | 10-03-2010 22:02 by BEGO Comments (0)  


   messageicon I've got to stop believing everything I think.
←Rate | 08-10-2011 10:23 by BEGO Comments (0)  


   messageicon Textaphrenia – thinking you've heard or felt a new text message vibration when there is no message.
←Rate | 09-06-2011 14:55 by BEGO Comments (0)  


   messageicon The best selling books are cookbooks and the second are diet books. So you can learn how not to eat what you've just learned how to cook.
←Rate | 03-16-2011 15:53 by BEGO Comments (0)  


   messageicon Haters will broadcast your failure, but whisper your success.
←Rate | 02-23-2012 21:50 by BEGO Comments (0)  


   messageicon when you see a sign at a restaurant that says 'employees must wash BOTH hands', I think that's when you have to worry...
←Rate | 01-11-2012 22:23 by BEGO Comments (0)  


   messageicon Most girls: “I hangout with guys, there's less drama.” Me: “I hangout by myself. There's no drama & I don't have to wear pants.”
←Rate | 07-05-2012 21:58 by BEGO Comments (0)  




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