santa AND presents AND christmas AND xmas AND holidays AND elfs Funny Status Messages

   During the holidays people have to make a choice between enjoying the holidays or spending it with the relatives.

   There are 361 days until Christmas and people already have their lights up. This is getting ridiculous.

   Big moment here: I just finished building that gingerbread house for the holidays.

   You people can keep blaming your weight or tight fitting clothes on the holidays if you want, but I am not going to lie to myself, most of you were Fat in December too

   Steam Workshop :: Zoey with Christmas Hat

   I guess I’ll take my Christmas tree down today.

   Hacked into Santa's computer and obtain is naughty girls list........ Looks like there be no more lonely nights for me.

   WIFE: I regret getting you that blender for Christmas. ME: {drinking toast} Why?

   Why do the Flintstones celebrate Christmas?....any scholars out there?

   FACT : If someone is playing Xmas music in October, you're legally allowed to kill them and use their corpse as a Halloween decoration.

   Santa Claus uses foreign elves to make his toys. It's time to bring those jobs back to America. Huge tariffs coming to the North Pole!

   You've already put up your Christmas tree? That's nothing. I'm already drunk for St. Patrick's Day.

   “Ho ho oh my God I can’t stop giggling!” -Santa Claus, after eating cookies in homes across Canada