Jackoo Funny Status Messages

   This Year I'm going to spend Valentine's day with my ex...... Box One

   If you can't be there for her tears, then don't expect to be around when other parts of her start gushing either...

   That one password you use for everything and if anyone ever figured it out they could single-handedly ruin your entire life.

   My iPhone is like a time machine. I go to spend a couple of minutes on Twitter and Facebook and suddenly it's an hour later

   Girls that text "kk" instead of "ok" are only like 3 bananas away from burning a cross in somebody's front yard

   I'm playing the Titanic drinking game. Every time you see someone dead you have a shot of vodka!

   Tampons are in the right place, at the wrong time.

   Have you ever pushed a door that said pull?

   If she gets up and goes and makes you a sandwich after sex. You're not doing it right

   One day there's gonna be a huge memorial dedicated to the people who sacrificed their lives to sit at a computer for the majority of their existence

   I hate it when women dress up on Halloween. It just reminds me of the times I wake up next to one of them after a good night out

   I swear some girls with big asses think they can get away with murder. You have a huge bass because your face is a car wreck, please behave yourself

   Your about as relevant as a Facebook poke

   What happens on holiday,stays on holiday. Except for STDs, they will always come back with you

   Someone said to me "I can never think of anything important or interesting to say on Facebook." I told them not to worry"

   ts not attractive to constantly look surprised! So get your crayons out and sketch a different pair of eyebrows please