MWC Funny Status Messages



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Page: 7 of 14

   messageicon Willie Nelson got hit by a car yesterday. He was playing "On the Road Again".
←Rate | 04-24-2013 18:19 by MWC Comments (0)  


   messageicon I went in to see a psychiatrist. I say, "Doc, I can't seem to make any friends. Can you help me, you fat slob?
←Rate | 04-24-2013 16:21 by MWC Comments (0)  


   messageicon I got arrested in LA and boy am I beat!
←Rate | 04-23-2013 07:08 by MWC Comments (0)  


   messageicon Don't be a sexist, broads hate that.
←Rate | 04-22-2013 19:53 by MWC Comments (0)  


   messageicon Why can't a pony sing? ............Because it's a little horse.
←Rate | 04-22-2013 17:42 by MWC Comments (0)  


   messageicon I'll bet any one of you I could stop gambling!
←Rate | 04-22-2013 13:34 by MWC Comments (0)  


   messageicon I am a kleptomaniac, and when it gets really bad I take something for it.
←Rate | 04-21-2013 20:51 by MWC Comments (0)  


   messageicon "Doc, I can't stop singing 'The Green, Green Grass of Home.'" "That sounds like Tom Jones Syndrome." "Is it common?" The doctor says, "It's Not Unusual."
←Rate | 04-21-2013 19:41 by MWC Comments (0)  


   messageicon I traded in my wife's piano for a clarinet. You can't sing while playing a clarinet.
←Rate | 04-21-2013 19:32 by MWC Comments (0)  


   messageicon I'm right 98% of the time. Who cares about the other 3%?
←Rate | 04-21-2013 18:19 by MWC Comments (0)  


   messageicon I just found out the big difference between an oral thermometer and a rectal thermometer? The taste.
←Rate | 04-21-2013 18:12 by MWC Comments (0)  


   messageicon Some people think I'm quiet, others wish I was.
←Rate | 04-21-2013 15:40 by MWC Comments (0)  


   messageicon Now who is running a MARATHON?
←Rate | 04-19-2013 10:33 by MWC Comments (0)  


   messageicon I stopped talking back to the voices in my head, and now they’ve started texting me…
←Rate | 04-18-2013 18:18 by MWC Comments (0)  


   messageicon How to make a woman go mmmmmmm all nite long? …………………….. with Duct Tape
←Rate | 04-18-2013 18:10 by MWC Comments (0)  


   messageicon I feel like I have my cranky pants pulled all the way up to my armpits!
←Rate | 04-18-2013 13:53 by MWC Comments (0)  


   messageicon what happens when a idiot can't get a gun and wants to make a scene?
←Rate | 04-15-2013 19:30 by MWC Comments (0)  


   messageicon Keep the dream alive.....Hit the snooze button 6 times
←Rate | 04-14-2013 10:09 by MWC Comments (0)  


   messageicon Ladies; Go bra less, it takes the wrinkles out of your face!
←Rate | 04-09-2013 12:35 by MWC Comments (0)  


   messageicon When Billy Joel is singing "I Don't Want Clever Conversation I Want You Just The Way You Are". Is he replying that she's stupid?
←Rate | 04-09-2013 12:33 by MWC Comments (0)  




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