JAB Funny Status Messages



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   messageicon I have an eating disorder. It called not starving to death. . .
←Rate | 11-08-2015 09:20 by JAB Comments (0)  


   messageicon The Definition Of Toilets: The one and only thing Obama is qualified to do, is clean toilets. . .
←Rate | 11-18-2015 11:29 by JAB Comments (0)  


   messageicon A word from our sponsors. Gobble, gobble, gobble. Because it's Thanksgiving and gobble, gobble. . .
←Rate | 11-26-2015 10:21 by JAB Comments (0)  


   messageicon Led Zeppelin doesn't have to be your favorite band. But if they're not one of your top three, we shouldn't be friends. . .
←Rate | 11-26-2015 17:15 by JAB Comments (0)  


   messageicon Don't take life laying down. That is, unless you're a prostitute. . .
←Rate | 11-29-2015 10:12 by JAB Comments (0)  


   messageicon To any American who wants a better life, leave the country, denounce your US citizenship and come back as an illegal immigrant. . .
←Rate | 11-30-2015 19:14 by JAB Comments (0)  


   messageicon What's the shelf life of an Elf on a shelf ?
←Rate | 12-18-2015 22:05 by JAB Comments (0)  


   messageicon If $ex is a pain in the a$$ you're doing it wrong, that's not what that hole is for. . .
←Rate | 12-20-2015 17:17 by JAB Comments (0)  


   messageicon My New Years resolution is to never make New Years resolutions!
←Rate | 12-29-2015 08:14 by JAB Comments (0)  


   messageicon Alcohol and denial are cheaper than therapy. . .
←Rate | 01-23-2016 17:37 by JAB Comments (0)  


   messageicon Am I the only one who gets disappointed pulling up next to a Kia Soul and there isn't a hamster driving it. . .
←Rate | 01-24-2016 07:51 by JAB Comments (0)  


   messageicon The definition of Vegetarian is an Indian word for bad hunter. . .
←Rate | 01-25-2016 18:13 by JAB Comments (0)  


   messageicon I used to be f#cking stupid, but her and I broke up about 10 years ago. . .
←Rate | 01-25-2016 19:46 by JAB Comments (0)  


   messageicon Does anyone know if oral $ex is Gluten free. Asking for a friend. . .
←Rate | 01-27-2016 06:51 by JAB Comments (0)  


   messageicon If there's a woman out there who wants to $exually harass me, let me know.. I will message you my cell # . . .
←Rate | 02-01-2016 15:27 by JAB Comments (0)  


   messageicon The smartest thing I never did, was get married. . .
←Rate | 02-16-2016 12:26 by JAB Comments (0)  


   messageicon The two best days of my life was when I got engaged and the day we broke it off. . .
←Rate | 02-16-2016 12:26 by JAB Comments (0)  


   messageicon Once upon a time a man was told to go f#ck himself and he lived happily ever after. . .
←Rate | 02-18-2016 20:58 by JAB Comments (0)  


   messageicon If we had to pay for internet ink. Facebook wouldn't exist.
←Rate | 02-19-2016 19:21 by JAB Comments (0)  


   messageicon In the news today Amanda Bynes got a haircut. Why is this news, who the f#uck is she and who the f#ck cares. . .
←Rate | 02-26-2016 15:57 by JAB Comments (0)  




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