Exercise Funny Status Messages

   My exercise regimen is basically just my heart rate elevating at an alarming level when I realize I'm out of beer.

   Attended a group exercise class using Shake Weights. We had trouble getting our rhythm at first but we finally all came together at the end.

   If youre going to give your kid a name like hes an 80s action hero, then make sure he goes outside every once and a while. Cause "Maverick" looks like the only exercise he gets it walking to the fridge and back to the Playstation.

   I have a very rigid exercise routine, involving daily jogs to the fridge to see what I have to eat.

   If it weren't for the fact that the TV set and the refrigerator are so far apart, some of us wouldn't get any exercise at all.

   The lockdown has made workout guru Richard Simmons popular again. It's like taking exercise advice from a marshmallow.

   Exercise your suck muscle ladies, it's Friday Night!

   Yesterday yet another person jumped the White House fence. It happened again. On the bright side, at least Michelle Obama is finally getting more Americans to exercise.

   Whenever I feel the need to exercise, I just lie down until it goes away...

   I want to lose weight but I don’t want to get caught up in one of those eat right and exercise scams

   As a Fat bottomed girl, I'm not sure how we're expected to make the Rockin' world go round. That sounds *way* too much like exercise to me

   Running away is not exercise.

   My doctor says I should exercise. Uh, excercise. That's that thing where you have to move, right?

   If you sweat when you eat, does it count as exercise?

   Me and the missus have got an aviary at home, but one of our birds of prey will only exercise at night to 80s music. Our Kestrel Manoeuvres In The Dark....

   I don't exercise to be healthy. I exercise to look sexy af naked!

   my wife said I drink too much and don't exercise enough. So I stole her pedometer. Half mile so far from the living room to the fridge!

   "If playing golf is exercise, then why aren't there driving ranges in health clubs?

   Goals Every College Student Should Accomplish This Summer: 1) Ween myself off coffee. 2) Exercise other than walking to classes. 3) Get onto a sleep cycle similar to that of a human. 4) PARTY!!!!

   Chasing the American Dream does not count as exercise.