love Funny Status Messages

   Dance like the photo's not being tagged. Love like you've never been unfriended. Sing like nobody's following. Share like you care. And do it all like it won't end up on FACEBOOK.

   You say stalker, I say dedicated. You say psycho, I say nothing says I love you like a severed cat head.

   Men, if you're looking to spoil your lady this christmas, make sure there's WIFI in the kitchen, chicks love WIFI in the kitchen.

   My bud just updated his Facebook status: "I love my girlfriend so much. You are my world xxxxx." I wonder why her name's encrypted.

   I'm knee deep in pu$$y. Seriously, my 19 cats love the hell outta me.

   Dear sleep , I kow we had problems when I was younger but I love you now.

   I love to put a box of cheerios in the mouth of the loved one that snores everynight

   I love sitting with her at night, holding hands, imagining life without her.

   I consider myself a hopeless romantic because I only fall in love with women who are out of my league.

   Turn the time release off on my morphine drip so I know your love is real.

   I've never been in love... But I imagine its similar to the feeling you get when you see your waiter arriving with your food.... :D

   I love you like white folks love their pet dogs.

   Nothing says I love you like letting your spouse use all the hot water first.

   Don't just love me, be in love with me & show me true happiness; after all, we've got to make it worth the forthcoming heartbreak.

   Everyone's like "I love Obama" or "I love Romney" and I'm just over here like "I love whiskey and beer"

   There's always somebody else out there that will love you, but not if you're ugly.

   I shouldn't have to say I love you when it's obvious that my p enis adores you.

   Make me sleep on the couch so I know our love is real.

   Always make love with your eyes open, and never forget to use your tongue when you kiss.

   I used to love your updates. Then you pissed me off, and now your updates piss me off too.