Kisstopher707 Funny Status Messages



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   messageicon She says she is surprised to see me but her drawn eyebrows tell a different story.
←Rate | 03-17-2015 13:06 by Kisstopher707 Comments (0)  


   messageicon cutting the fat off bacon is like cutting the bacon off bacon
←Rate | 03-10-2015 01:56 by Kisstopher707 Comments (0)  


   messageicon My dog says that dress is grey.
←Rate | 03-01-2015 12:18 by Kisstopher707 Comments (0)  


   messageicon Don't be afraid to love again. Just kidding
←Rate | 02-25-2015 11:45 by Kisstopher707 Comments (0)  


   messageicon I stole every word of this status from a dictionary.
←Rate | 02-23-2015 10:16 by Kisstopher707 Comments (0)  


   messageicon My master plan is just a Post-it note that says “drink more.”
←Rate | 02-22-2015 08:26 by Kisstopher707 Comments (0)  


   messageicon CONGRATULATIONS! You are the 13th woman he's called "beautiful" on Facebook today.
←Rate | 02-18-2015 13:03 by Kisstopher707 Comments (0)  


   messageicon People really need to get with the times. Smartphones are not for talking anymore.
←Rate | 02-16-2015 11:34 by Kisstopher707 Comments (0)  


   messageicon Judging by these FB & T witter quotes attributed to her, Marilyn Monroe sure got smart four decades after she died.
←Rate | 02-16-2015 11:29 by Kisstopher707 Comments (0)  


   messageicon Unless the only drama in this relationship is just us out of alcohol, I am indifferent to it.
←Rate | 02-13-2015 11:20 by Kisstopher707 Comments (0)  


   messageicon What if NASCAR is really just rednecks saying "nice car"
←Rate | 02-11-2015 16:24 by Kisstopher707 Comments (0)  


   messageicon Welcome to WebMD. Type quickly, you don't have long to live.
←Rate | 02-08-2015 09:51 by Kisstopher707 Comments (0)  


   messageicon Kristen Stewart is like if Internet Explorer was a person.
←Rate | 02-02-2015 00:46 by Kisstopher707 Comments (0)  


   messageicon The number of STDs she can spell without autocorrect really bothers me.
←Rate | 01-31-2015 09:33 by Kisstopher707 Comments (0)  


   messageicon You had me at "Hello"... But you lost me when you kept talking.
←Rate | 01-30-2015 00:59 by Kisstopher707 Comments (0)  


   messageicon Social Media: Because I like to socialize with cool people without having to speak, wear pants or get off the couch.
←Rate | 01-27-2015 12:39 by Kisstopher707 Comments (0)  


   messageicon Yes I will disappoint you, but I will disappoint you with style.
←Rate | 01-25-2015 05:42 by Kisstopher707 Comments (0)  


   messageicon Sure, I'll go to your open bar and watch you get married.
←Rate | 01-17-2015 11:04 by Kisstopher707 Comments (0)  


   messageicon T rolls used to live under bridges, now they live in their mom's basement.
←Rate | 01-16-2015 23:30 by Kisstopher707 Comments (0)  


   messageicon Love is when two intelligent minds come together and become dumb.
←Rate | 01-06-2015 11:40 by Kisstopher707 Comments (0)  



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