huck Funny Status Messages



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   messageicon Been a while since “It’s the End of the World as We Know It” & “We Didn’t Start the Fire.” We need a new song where someone yells a list.
←Rate | 01-05-2013 08:54 by Huck Comments (0)  


   messageicon 1. Sit down next to stranger on park bench. 2. Place an envelope beside him. 3. Whisper, "It has to look like an accident." 4. Walk away.
←Rate | 01-11-2013 06:11 by Huck Comments (0)  


   messageicon If you try to win an argument by comparing the other side to "nazis", you are worse than Hitler.
←Rate | 01-11-2013 06:28 by Huck Comments (0)  


   messageicon I've never met a group of people more worried about their "privacy" than the people on Facebook that share EVERYTHING about themselves.
←Rate | 01-18-2013 07:50 by Huck Comments (0)  


   messageicon I heard that Tom Brady isn't going to the pro bowl for an undisclosed injury. Didn't know bruised ego was a real injury.
←Rate | 01-22-2013 10:50 by Huck Comments (0)  


   messageicon My biggest fear is dying and becoming a ghost that has to go around and get people to try my blueberry cereal.
←Rate | 01-25-2013 09:01 by Huck Comments (1)  


   messageicon I'm starting to think Chris Brown is in Fight Club
←Rate | 01-29-2013 06:35 by Huck Comments (0)  


   messageicon "I went to Jared" I whispered as she slowly opened the velvety box of Subway coupons
←Rate | 02-15-2013 06:06 by Huck Comments (0)  


   messageicon FACT: One thing that I have never had in the glove box of my car, is a pair of gloves.
←Rate | 02-19-2013 06:18 by Huck Comments (0)  


   messageicon I've never once jumped into a taxi and yelled, "FOLLOW THAT CAR!" Life is disappointing and movies are liars.
←Rate | 02-21-2013 06:09 by Huck Comments (0)  


   messageicon I'm reading the ingredients on a can of dog food, and I'm shocked to see that 17% of it is "kids' homework".
←Rate | 02-24-2013 08:23 by Huck Comments (0)  


   messageicon Want to end road rage? Put manual windows in every car. By the time you're done rolling down your window to yell, you're too tired to be mad
←Rate | 02-26-2013 06:35 by Huck Comments (0)  


   messageicon Why don't we throw the world's garbage in quicksand?
←Rate | 02-27-2013 06:10 by Huck Comments (0)  


   messageicon I walk away from auto-flush toilets like movie stars walk away from explosions
←Rate | 02-28-2013 06:12 by Huck Comments (0)  


   messageicon I just lost my mood ring, I don't know how I feel about that
←Rate | 03-02-2013 06:00 by Huck Comments (0)  


   messageicon WHAT IF PEOPLE USED CAPS LOCK FOR EVERYTHING THEN USED LOWERCASE FOR EMPHASIS, THAT WOULD BE really weird
←Rate | 03-05-2013 05:48 by Huck Comments (0)  


   messageicon I just got done doing 5 sets of diddly squats.
←Rate | 03-06-2013 07:11 by Huck Comments (0)  


   messageicon Seemed to cruel to get my dog fixed. So instead I got him a really crappy haircut. And now he can't even get a date.
←Rate | 03-06-2013 07:43 by Huck Comments (0)  


   messageicon Do you think in China the forklifts are called chopstick lifts?
←Rate | 03-06-2013 07:44 by Huck Comments (0)  


   messageicon I don't go to bars anymore, but I miss some things about it. So sometimes I wait outside my bathroom for 15 minutes when I'm dying to pee.
←Rate | 03-08-2013 06:10 by Huck Comments (0)  



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