JEBI Funny Status Messages



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   messageicon iPhone 6 will be wider, but at my age, I'll tap anything...
←Rate | 01-21-2014 14:57 by JEBI Comments (0)  


   messageicon "Really???" - Barbie, the first time she saw Ken without pants
←Rate | 01-22-2014 15:48 by JEBI Comments (0)  


   messageicon Dear Justin Bieber, Just because you have money...doesn't mean that you're mature. Grow up, smarten up, or shut the hell up! Thanks, People
←Rate | 01-24-2014 15:44 by JEBI Comments (0)  


   messageicon "Hello Kitty" should have been a brand of condoms...
←Rate | 01-25-2014 13:24 by JEBI Comments (0)  


   messageicon I'd make more Broncos jokes, but I don't want to beat a dead horse...
←Rate | 02-03-2014 09:26 by JEBI Comments (0)  


   messageicon I got married so that I can be autocorrected even when my phone is off.
←Rate | 02-24-2014 10:24 by JEBI Comments (0)  


   messageicon Scratching off a lotto ticket before you leave the store is a good way of letting people know that your life isn't going according to plan...
←Rate | 05-09-2014 11:11 by JEBI Comments (0)  


   messageicon Yesterday I had to screw in a light bulb . Later, I crossed a road and walked into a bar. My life is a joke...
←Rate | 05-09-2014 11:13 by JEBI Comments (0)  


   messageicon I just got my foot stuck in my wife's bra. I asked her what kind of boobie trap is this? She laughed and I laughed and she asked me never tell another joke for at least a week...
←Rate | 05-09-2014 11:19 by JEBI Comments (0)  


   messageicon Experience is a wonderful thing. It enables you to recognize a mistake when you make it again...
←Rate | 05-12-2014 15:16 by JEBI Comments (0)  


   messageicon I want to know what horrific ideas were rejected before they decided "Vagisil" was the best possible brand name?
←Rate | 05-12-2014 15:19 by JEBI Comments (0)  


   messageicon My wife wanted a puppy .I didn't want a puppy . So we compromised and got a puppy...
←Rate | 05-12-2014 15:22 by JEBI Comments (0)  


   messageicon My wife and I didn't know the handles on the mattress are to MOVE it!! We've been totally misusing them this whole time!
←Rate | 05-12-2014 15:25 by JEBI Comments (0)  


   messageicon If my life had a soundtrack it would be the sound of a rusty gate slowly closing and then falling off its hinges onto a bunch of ugly cats...
←Rate | 05-14-2014 10:07 by JEBI Comments (0)  


   messageicon If you walk a mile in my shoes, you'll end up at the bar...
←Rate | 05-14-2014 10:08 by JEBI Comments (1)  


   messageicon If your status update has been edited, there is a 95% chance I will browse through your mistakes before I read the actual update...
←Rate | 05-14-2014 10:09 by JEBI Comments (0)  


   messageicon Operator: 911 what's your emergency? Caller: My wifes going into labor, I don't know what to do. Operator: Is this her first born? Caller: No, this is her husband.
←Rate | 05-14-2014 11:09 by JEBI Comments (0)  


   messageicon I recently went to the dentist and he wanted to take a mould of my mouth. When he was done he didn't like the mould so he asked me to do it again. I said "WHAT?! I usually make a good first impression..."
←Rate | 10-16-2014 11:16 by JEBI Comments (0)  


   messageicon Why do you Americans have to involve race in everything? Leave it to the media to put ideas into your minds. The country/world will never know peace until we start referring to each other as human beings. One Love...
←Rate | 12-08-2014 14:50 by JEBI Comments (1)  


   messageicon Guys...dont mess up and buy her the wrong brand of vacuum cleaner for Valentines Day this year...
←Rate | 02-09-2015 12:58 by JEBI Comments (0)  




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