ff1241 Funny Status Messages



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   messageicon The one person you would take a bullet for is usually the one behind the gun.
←Rate | 03-26-2012 21:20 by ff1241 Comments (0)  


   messageicon Head banging to rock music doesn't have the same effect when your bald. Ask me how I know this.
←Rate | 04-21-2012 20:10 by ff1241 Comments (0)  


   messageicon People must do well to remember that a nose belongs on the face and not stuck in SOME OTHER PLACE.
←Rate | 01-29-2011 23:28 by ff1241 Comments (0)  


   messageicon A camp fire is alot like masterbation. As long as you have wood you can keep yourself entertained. But when its gone the fun is over.
←Rate | 05-30-2012 16:33 by ff1241 Comments (0)  


   messageicon If I ever own a bar I'm going to name it "church". I'll also get a Mexican bartender named Jesus.
←Rate | 01-11-2011 20:01 by ff1241 Comments (6)  


   messageicon My life is like this. I need a spoon but the only thing they offer are chopsticks.
←Rate | 09-13-2011 18:21 by ff1241 Comments (0)  


   messageicon Lets just say I like my milk without the chunks. Don't ask me how I know this.
←Rate | 03-07-2011 02:52 by ff1241 Comments (0)  


   messageicon AR15 rifle with scope- $1,600, 900 Rds of Lake City XM193 AF 5.56 loaded in 30 magazines $600, Emergency food suplies $1000, Cost of everything during the zombie apocalypse = Priceless
←Rate | 11-14-2010 22:01 by ff1241 Comments (1)  


   messageicon Ladies, you can't be the first, but you can be the next.
←Rate | 12-01-2010 21:58 by ff1241 Comments (0)  


   messageicon I'm glad people have the confidence to wear revealing clothing but sometimes your confidence is NOT very pleasant to look at.
←Rate | 06-28-2012 19:41 by ff1241 Comments (0)  


   messageicon having a staring contest with a bottle of Jack.
←Rate | 05-28-2011 15:33 by ff1241 Comments (0)  


   messageicon The smoke smell you might have been smelling today was from Minnesota Viking fans burning their Brett Farve jerseys.
←Rate | 09-14-2011 00:15 by ff1241 Comments (0)  


   messageicon as pissed off as being in the express checkout land behind an old laldy, with too many items, using coupons for every item, and with a new clerk calling for a price check.
←Rate | 09-19-2011 02:16 by ff1241 Comments (0)  


   messageicon Only dead fish go with the flow.
←Rate | 04-30-2012 14:34 by ff1241 Comments (0)  


   messageicon New Years Eve – one of the only days when it is socially acceptable to start drinking this early. I just hope I'll be sober enought to drive from work to the bar.
←Rate | 12-31-2010 18:48 by ff1241 Comments (0)  


   messageicon I like animals more than people. Mind you I also kill, skin, butcher, and eat animals.
←Rate | 08-02-2013 03:49 by ff1241 Comments (0)  


   messageicon If you eat smores with a knife and fork you have no soul.
←Rate | 07-04-2011 17:35 by ff1241 Comments (0)  


   messageicon I'm not drunk I'm just German
←Rate | 03-07-2011 21:48 by ff1241 Comments (0)  


   messageicon Was told to set an example. So I picked to be a bad example
←Rate | 01-29-2011 23:27 by ff1241 Comments (0)  


   messageicon and took him out. This is NOT an Obama victory, but an AMERICAN victory!!
←Rate | 05-02-2011 22:19 by ff1241 Comments (0)  



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