Kisstopher Funny Status Messages



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   messageicon If you love someone, set them fee. If they don't come back, call them up later when you're drunk.
←Rate | 03-26-2012 14:21 by Kisstopher Comments (0)  


   messageicon People who want to share their religious views with you almost never want you to share yours with them.
←Rate | 04-24-2011 12:04 by Kisstopher Comments (0)  


   messageicon Ladies: A good man can make you feel sexy, strong and able to take on the world...oh sorry thats wine...wine does that.
←Rate | 02-12-2012 12:39 by Kisstopher Comments (0)  


   messageicon You know you're fat when you run out of breath eating.
←Rate | 08-31-2011 02:47 by KISSTOPHER Comments (0)  


   messageicon What if random erections are actually ninja handjobs?
←Rate | 01-15-2012 13:35 by KISSTOPHER Comments (0)  


   messageicon Who do I speak to about quitting adulthood?
←Rate | 10-19-2012 08:45 by Kisstopher Comments (0)  


   messageicon In my lifetime I have learnt that women, who appear quiet, shy and innocent looking in public are actually the biggest freaks behind closed doors.
←Rate | 08-14-2011 07:13 by KISSTOPHER Comments (0)  


   messageicon ‎"Give it to me!" she said, "I'm so wet, give it to me right now!" And I replied, “Screw you, it's my umbrella!”
←Rate | 04-29-2012 12:22 by Kisstopher Comments (0)  


   messageicon Today is world animal day...let's all take a moment of silence... and remember our Ex's
←Rate | 04-14-2011 03:25 by Kisstopher Comments (0)  


   messageicon The liquor store is a great place to meet new friends.
←Rate | 09-19-2012 10:13 by Kisstopher Comments (0)  


   messageicon Studies show that your chances of getting murdered drop down significantly when you STFU and mind your own business.
←Rate | 07-25-2012 15:14 by Kisstopher Comments (0)  


   messageicon Whatever happened to that little girl from The Ring, did she grow up to be Kristen Stewart?
←Rate | 09-13-2012 06:19 by Kisstopher Comments (0)  


   messageicon When you love someone truly and unconditionally, age, distance, bank balance, height or weight is just a damn number.
←Rate | 05-06-2011 02:46 by Kisstopher Comments (0)  


   messageicon If coffee or booze can't fix it, then it's a serious problem.
←Rate | 06-01-2012 13:44 by Kisstopher Comments (0)  


   messageicon The best time to give kids advice is when they're still young enough to believe you.
←Rate | 05-05-2012 11:38 by Kisstopher Comments (0)  


   messageicon Oh, let's play that love game where you ignore me constantly and it kills me inside, then I start ignoring you too and it gets your attention!
←Rate | 09-24-2012 13:40 by Kisstopher Comments (0)  


   messageicon At least this apocalypse and rapture debacle has conclusively proven one significant fact: We are not alone! We have idiots living among us!
←Rate | 05-22-2011 05:38 by KISSTOPHER Comments (0)  


   messageicon Three Apples changed the world. The first one tempted Eve, the second inspired Newton and the third was offered to the world half eaten by Steve Jobs. RIP
←Rate | 10-06-2011 02:29 by KISSTOPHER Comments (0)  


   messageicon ME: "I wasn't that drunk!" MY FRIEND: “Dude, you asked your girlfriend if she was single.”
←Rate | 06-19-2011 02:44 by KISSTOPHER Comments (0)  


   messageicon The best part about working from home is the alcohol.
←Rate | 12-21-2012 08:12 by Kisstopher Comments (0)  




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