Heather25 Funny Status Messages



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   messageicon I wonder if stalking your stalker bothers them?
←Rate | 12-03-2010 09:16 by Heather25 Comments (0)  


   messageicon I dare you to walk into the cookie factory and say "Hi I'm here to apply for the fudge packer position".
←Rate | 12-10-2010 16:23 by Heather25 Comments (0)  


   messageicon You did WHAT?? With WHO?? Behind WHAT barn?? For how many COOKIES!?!?
←Rate | 09-27-2010 03:51 by Heather25 Comments (0)  


   messageicon If you swallow, then you don't have to worry about getting any on your face, now will you?
←Rate | 10-06-2010 17:18 by Heather25 Comments (0)  


   messageicon Being in politics is like being a football coach. You have to be smart enough to understand the game, and dumb enough to think it's important.
←Rate | 12-03-2010 09:02 by Heather25 Comments (0)  


   messageicon Don't make the same mistake your parents did...Use birth control! ;)
←Rate | 10-01-2010 14:39 by Heather25 Comments (0)  


   messageicon Makeover?? Honey you need to be ran over!!
←Rate | 10-12-2010 18:17 by Heather25 Comments (0)  


   messageicon Dear Mr. undercover police car, I like your 5 extra antennas. ;)
←Rate | 10-25-2010 14:10 by Heather25 Comments (3)  


   messageicon just wants to be someones "Dirty little secret!"
←Rate | 12-10-2010 15:53 by Heather25 Comments (0)  


   messageicon There comes a time in life when all you can do is just slap the b*tch!
←Rate | 12-10-2010 15:17 by Heather25 Comments (0)  


   messageicon So tell me, how DO you keep up with all your lies?
←Rate | 12-10-2010 16:45 by Heather25 Comments (0)  


   messageicon No, it doesn't particularly taste good. And I don't care about the protein content.
←Rate | 10-06-2010 17:15 by Heather25 Comments (2)  


   messageicon How come no one will ever hold my hand and skip with me in public places??
←Rate | 12-07-2010 14:53 by Heather25 Comments (0)  


   messageicon Just because "it's awake" when you get up does not mean I have to "kiss it good morning". ;)
←Rate | 10-06-2010 17:15 by Heather25 Comments (2)  


   messageicon I don't care HOW relaxed you get, it is NEVER OK to fart.
←Rate | 10-06-2010 17:14 by Heather25 Comments (0)  


   messageicon Mean people suck. Nice people swallow. Great people do BOTH. ;)
←Rate | 10-20-2010 13:33 by Heather25 Comments (0)  


   messageicon You and your rumors...you both get around. ;)
←Rate | 10-12-2010 18:15 by Heather25 Comments (0)  


   messageicon A woman woke her husband one night and said, 'There's a burglar in the kitchen eating my home-made steak and kidney pie!' 'Oh dear: said her husband. 'Who shall I call, police or ambulance?'
←Rate | 12-03-2010 08:44 by Heather25 Comments (0)  


   messageicon You b*tch about the taste, but trust me when I tell you that we get the short end of the stick in flavor country.
←Rate | 10-06-2010 17:17 by Heather25 Comments (0)  


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