Funny Status Messages and Tweets

Funny Status Messages for Facebook, Discord, and Whatsapp and funny tweets for Twitter.

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   messageicon Lori Loughlin is wondering how the Coronavirus got into Princeton and her kid didn’t.
←Rate | 03-19-2020 08:26 Comments (0)  


   messageicon I’m gonna tell you something right now, tis not the time to have allergies.
←Rate | 03-19-2020 08:28 Comments (0)  


   messageicon Ladies, if you're over 50, you may wanna rethink the cowboy hat. It's terrifying.
←Rate | 03-19-2020 08:58 Comments (0)  


   messageicon Today's drink: The Quarantini. It's a regular martini, but you drink it alone in your house.
←Rate | 03-19-2020 10:26 Comments (0)  


   messageicon Don't see why everyone is hording toilet paper for.... it does have 2 sides
←Rate | 03-19-2020 10:53 by Migasjoe Comments (0)  


   messageicon Honey that posted this below dont lie to these folks, you never did have a 401k, hell you never worked a day in your life.
←Rate | 03-19-2020 14:01 Comments (0)  


   messageicon Gas is only a buck a gallon and we're not allowed to leave our houses...
←Rate | 03-19-2020 14:34 Comments (0)  


   messageicon We are about three weeks away from knowing everyone’s true hair color.
←Rate | 03-19-2020 20:08 by McCord740 Comments (0)  


   messageicon While socially distancing myself I guess this will be a good time to finish reading the internet.
←Rate | 03-19-2020 20:27 Comments (0)  


   messageicon I always confuse reptiles and amphibians. OK to be honest, neither one knows what I’m talking about.
←Rate | 03-19-2020 20:34 by Rickster Comments (0)  


   messageicon WTF, everyone is talking about social distancing rule...Haven't we been doing that since we opened facebook accounts?
←Rate | 03-19-2020 22:01 Comments (0)  


   messageicon I'm here to announce that I too am suspending my Presidential Campaign. I want to thank all my supporters and the one or two of you that even knew that I was running.
←Rate | 03-20-2020 00:06 by T Comments (0)  


   messageicon I got 352 likes Facebook post and somehow I feel I should get some sort of Facebook consolation prize, or something.
←Rate | 03-20-2020 00:17 Comments (0)  


   messageicon I’ve been checking my temperature periodically every day. Did you know that it’s not necessary to do it rectally? Wish someone would’ve told me sooner!
←Rate | 03-20-2020 00:32 by Vaterpop Comments (0)  


   messageicon California has been shut down for bussiness
←Rate | 03-20-2020 01:27 Comments (0)  


   messageicon So showing up at the bank with a mask and gloves is okay now
←Rate | 03-20-2020 02:40 Comments (0)  


   messageicon Now would be a good time to pave the roads
←Rate | 03-20-2020 07:27 Comments (0)  


   messageicon I wonder if I'll ever be mature enough to write the word "LOOK" without making the O's look like funny cartoon eyes.
←Rate | 03-20-2020 10:29 Comments (0)  


   messageicon This is the first time in history when we can save the Human Race by lying in front of the TV doing nothing. Let's not screw this up.
←Rate | 03-20-2020 10:41 Comments (0)  


   messageicon What if it was April fools of next year when someone finally reveals to you the self quarantine ended 11 months ago.
←Rate | 03-20-2020 11:44 by Smeebert Comments (0)  




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