Funny Status Messages and Tweets

Funny Facebook Status Messages or Whatsapp updates and funny tweets for Twitter.

Sort:  Recent   |  Oldest  |  Rating
Filter On | Filter Off | No Trump


Search Messages:
Page: 5847 of 5985

   messageicon staring at a Orange Juice box, dancing in front of a beer, and is having a epileptic seizure in front of some salad dressing...
←Rate | 09-13-2009 23:22 by Todd Rollison | Tags: Filtered Comments (0)  


   messageicon knows your thinking about me, why else would you be reading this!
←Rate | 09-13-2009 22:00 | Tags: Filtered Comments (0)  


   messageicon Why do couples hold hands during their wedding day?.?.?.?.... It is just a formality, like two boxers shaking hands b4 the fight begins
←Rate | 09-13-2009 20:47 by Nima Sadeghian | Tags: Filtered Comments (0)  


   messageicon going to haunt you for eternity [mood:Dead]
←Rate | 09-13-2009 17:50 by Vanessa | Tags: Filtered Comments (0)  


   messageicon has got to know what you think so he can get you to think what he thinks!
←Rate | 09-13-2009 17:02 by Norino | Tags: Filtered Comments (0)  


   messageicon make sure you dont fall in love cuz I dont have the time for that
←Rate | 09-13-2009 16:57 by mel | Tags: Filtered Comments (0)  


   messageicon very funny Scotty; now beam down my clothes !!!
←Rate | 09-13-2009 16:13 | Tags: Filtered Comments (0)  


   messageicon 's charm is more contageous than swine flu !
←Rate | 09-13-2009 11:16 by russ | Tags: Filtered Comments (0)  


   messageicon leaving you breathless.......by choking you!
←Rate | 09-13-2009 11:14 by russ | Tags: Filtered Comments (0)  


   messageicon I got 99 problems but a red balloon ain't one.
←Rate | 09-13-2009 11:14 by Vito | Tags: Filtered Comments (0)  


   messageicon There's a new michael Jackson cartoon coming out that teaches kids how to play with other kids since he's no longer here to do it
←Rate | 09-13-2009 10:46 | Tags: Filtered Comments (0)  


   messageicon Still too Drunk to Update her status
←Rate | 09-13-2009 09:46 by May | Tags: Filtered Comments (0)  


   messageicon One tectonic plate bumped into another and said....."Sorry, my fault"
←Rate | 09-13-2009 07:20 Comments (0)  


   messageicon Past, Present and Future walked into a Bar. It ws tense.
←Rate | 09-13-2009 07:18 by lemonpillow | Tags: Filtered Comments (0)  


   messageicon sound so full of joy as he quietly crept from bed. And quickly pulled the window down and crushed its f*cken head
←Rate | 09-12-2009 23:31 | Tags: Filtered Comments (0)  


   messageicon going on a journey to the deepest darkest corners of my bedroom in search of what some may call a "floor"
←Rate | 09-12-2009 18:31 | Tags: Filtered Comments (0)  


   messageicon I don't know about you, but I'm sick of seeing disabled people being pushed around...
←Rate | 09-12-2009 15:27 by lemonpillow Comments (0)  


   messageicon My mate told me I always speak like a computer geek. I LOL'D.
←Rate | 09-12-2009 15:24 by lemonpillow | Tags: Filtered Comments (0)  


   messageicon I had to take a drugs test the other day and it came back negative.Which means my dealer's got some explaining to do.
←Rate | 09-12-2009 15:20 by lemonpillow | Tags: Filtered Comments (0)  


   messageicon thinking some mistakes are too fun to only do once
←Rate | 09-12-2009 14:04 by blade | Tags: Filtered Comments (0)  




Submit your own funny facebook status message here:
Name:
Status Message:

... characters left