Funny Status Messages and Tweets
Funny Status Messages for Facebook, Discord, and Whatsapp and funny tweets for Twitter.
Page: 5817 of 6367
always feels so weird after having hot dreams about my friends. I find it hard to look them in the eye for the few days after.
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06-28-2010 07:26
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Don't tell God how big your problems are, tell your problems how big your God is.
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06-28-2010 05:06 by Danmanz
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Africans finally have the chance to tell the English to go back to their own country!
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06-28-2010 01:19
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It's Raining Men! Hallelujah! - It's Raining Men! Hey, hey!!!- Wait, nope it's just raining.....figures!
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06-28-2010 00:30 by Gr`apes
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trying to develop a life off of facebook.....as you can see, its not working.....
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06-27-2010 21:59
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Spongebob is no longer living in his pineapple under the sea. He's kicking it in my tub. It's gonna take a while to get the oil off he says.
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06-27-2010 21:31
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A friend will help you move. A best friend will help you move the body.
you wouldn't happen to have your missing DVD player's remote... would you?
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06-27-2010 20:31 by Aaron
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repairing his/her wall. Thanks Kool Aid Man.
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06-27-2010 20:11
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a good friend will bail you out of jail, a best friend will be in there with you and a sister will stand outside the cell laughing at you
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06-27-2010 18:29
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No Budweisor I have not been drinking any officers tonight
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06-27-2010 18:22
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⎝⏠⏝⏠⎠
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06-27-2010 17:17
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Go Go Gadget status!
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06-27-2010 16:50
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Why put G20 in heaviest populated city in Canada? It's not like we don't have room anywhere else in the second largest country in the world....
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06-27-2010 16:10
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a firm believer that drinking beer makes you you smarter...I mean, it did make Bud weiser!!
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06-27-2010 15:52 by COREY
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Whats that Mr. Churchill; you say the germans are picking on your nation again, and you want need some help.
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06-27-2010 15:06
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Sometimes in order to see the light, you must blind yourself to bullsh*t
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06-27-2010 13:50 by Shou-Lin
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A smile is a sign of joy. A hug is a sign of love. A laugh is a sign of happiness. And a friend like me…Sh*t, that's just a sign of good taste!!
Opportunity knocks but once... if Opportunity knocks twice...Opportunity walks in and steals your TV set
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06-27-2010 13:27
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They say "don't drink and drive" but yesterday I was drinking a juice box while on my tricycle. It made me feel dangerous!
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06-27-2010 13:00
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