Funny Status Messages



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   messageicon Oscar Mayer needs to change the labeling on their bacon packages to read "Excellent source of hangover cure."
←Rate | 08-07-2010 12:32 Comments (0)  


   messageicon Thanking God the whole Justin Bieber writing an autobiography thing was just a rumor.. That would have been the shortest autobiography ever... All 16 pages of it... 18 if you count the index and contents..
←Rate | 08-07-2010 12:20 Comments (0)  


   messageicon There's nothing I hate worse than coming home drunk, needing to piss really bad and.... finding the kitchen sink full of dirty dishes.
←Rate | 08-07-2010 12:12 Comments (0)  


   messageicon trying to remember the thing I was suppose to remind myself about, but I can't remember where I put my sticky notes.. DAMNIT !!!
←Rate | 08-07-2010 11:56 by MEMEMEME Comments (0)  


   messageicon Many years ago,Ozzy Osbourne asked me how he could get publicity to help his music career. I told him he needed a bright red hat. He thought I said "bite the head off a bat". And the rest,of course is history.
←Rate | 08-07-2010 11:39 by jack Comments (0)  


   messageicon : Twists and Turns and yet NO Lessons Learned!!!! :(
←Rate | 08-07-2010 10:45 Comments (0)  


   messageicon ts always hard waiting for something that you want but whats even harder is knowing its everything youve always wanted
←Rate | 08-07-2010 10:43 Comments (1)  


   messageicon Live as if your were to die tomorrow. Learn as if you were to live forever.
←Rate | 08-07-2010 10:15 Comments (0)  


   messageicon born to party forced to study
←Rate | 08-07-2010 07:17 by jamesgitonga Comments (0)  


   messageicon If steak and B.J. day isn't a real holiday, than neither Is ''daughter day.''
←Rate | 08-07-2010 01:50 by Jason Comments (0)  


   messageicon ...Tila Tequila denies sex tape rumors. Good. When most Asians talk about doggie-style it usually means how they want their dinner prepared!
←Rate | 08-07-2010 01:04 by The Legal Eagle Comments (1)  


   messageicon going to live forever or die trying.
←Rate | 08-07-2010 00:09 Comments (1)  


   messageicon Thumbnail pics. Helping ugly people look hot until you click on them since 1995.
←Rate | 08-06-2010 22:57 Comments (0)  


   messageicon Woohoo! Just got my new class ring. I hope I don't lose THIS one in a cheerleader!
←Rate | 08-06-2010 22:57 Comments (0)  


   messageicon is the lime in your Corona!
←Rate | 08-06-2010 22:56 Comments (0)  


   messageicon If people lived like there was no tomorrow. I'm sure everyone would be at church right now
←Rate | 08-06-2010 22:13 Comments (0)  


   messageicon If blow jobs were this popular 25 years ago. I might not be here today
←Rate | 08-06-2010 21:58 Comments (0)  


   messageicon Just met the girl of my dreams and then I woke up
←Rate | 08-06-2010 21:04 by Russell K Comments (0)  


   messageicon Note to Self: when going on the first date, must make sure that both parties have the same understanding of what "eating out " means.
←Rate | 08-06-2010 20:23 by geez Comments (0)  


   messageicon Like Buttons: for people too lazy to post a comment.
←Rate | 08-06-2010 20:15 by geez Comments (0)  




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