jake Funny Status Messages



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   messageicon Where do crazy people ride their bikes? On a psychopath.
←Rate | 07-04-2018 16:29 by Jake Comments (0)  


   messageicon The definition of surprise: a fart with a lump in it.
←Rate | 07-04-2018 16:26 by Jake Comments (0)  


   messageicon Gynaecologist: A female private investigator.
←Rate | 07-04-2018 16:24 by Jake Comments (0)  


   messageicon It's better for people to think you're a fool then open your mouth and remove all dout.
←Rate | 07-03-2018 14:21 by Jake Comments (2)  


   messageicon A man of few words is a married man.
←Rate | 07-01-2018 19:40 by Jake Comments (0)  


   messageicon No matter how much you shake your peg...... The last drop always goes down your leg.
←Rate | 07-01-2018 03:54 by Jake Comments (0)  


   messageicon When things get to stressful I hit the jim.......... Beam.
←Rate | 06-29-2018 23:25 by Jake Comments (0)  


   messageicon Both corn and beer looks the same on the way in as they do on the way out.
←Rate | 06-29-2018 20:07 by Jake Comments (0)  


   messageicon A person who is bad at math should never take a calculated risk.
←Rate | 06-28-2018 22:40 by Jake Comments (0)  


   messageicon Before I die I'm going to eat a bag of popcorn kernels. My cremation should be spectacular.
←Rate | 06-28-2018 22:30 by Jake Comments (0)  


   messageicon I live in a small town where the population never changes. Every time a girl gets pregant a guy leaves town.
←Rate | 06-27-2018 21:57 by Jake Comments (0)  


   messageicon Difference between a G spot and a golf ball. Guys will search for a golf ball.
←Rate | 06-27-2018 21:24 by Jake Comments (0)  


   messageicon Went to a costume party dressed as a chicken. Ment a girl dressed as an egg. We spent the night at my place. And I found out the answer to that old question. It was the chicken.
←Rate | 06-26-2018 15:31 by Jake Comments (0)  


   messageicon What's the last thing Tickle Me Elmo recieves before leaving the factory? Two test-tickles.
←Rate | 06-25-2018 01:55 by Jake Comments (0)  


   messageicon Getting married is the second most popular thing we do in our lifetime. Getting divorce is the first.
←Rate | 06-24-2018 00:58 by Jake Comments (0)  


   messageicon The one good thing about an egotist. They don't talk about other people.
←Rate | 06-20-2018 23:12 by Jake Comments (0)  


   messageicon I've been hard at work all day today. I accidentally took a viagra pill in stead of my vitamin this morning.
←Rate | 06-20-2018 18:52 by Jake Comments (0)  


   messageicon I never go to bed with ugly women. But somehow I wake up with them.
←Rate | 06-20-2018 14:48 by Jake Comments (0)  


   messageicon My memory is so bad that.............
←Rate | 06-18-2018 23:44 by Jake Comments (0)  


   messageicon When someone says "good luck with that" are they being nice or sarcastic?
←Rate | 06-18-2018 22:58 by Jake Comments (0)  


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