XX-FOXY Funny Status Messages

   Normal people are the crazy psychos who hide it very well!

   Just to remind you: about 152 Days left to Christmas and 148 until the end of world happens again! Enjoy it!

   I'm making a list of regrets. Just to be sure I'm accurate, what's the name of Justin Bieber's first album?

   What if the 12/21/12 is the day Winrar trial period ends?

   LADIES: If your father is a poor man, it is your fate... But if your father-in-law is a poor man, it's your stupidity!

   Hello Verizon... This is President Obama... I am interested in your share everything plan...

   "Hi, Welcome to Abercrombie. Our sizes are; Small, X Small, Anorexic, Bulimic, and Malnourished."

   I don’t trust people who smile at 8AM on Mondays…

   I'm pro-choice on every social issue...Simply because it is none of my business how others choose to live their lives. We're only responsible on decisions we make.

   The worst sanction on Vladimer Putin from USA: if we send Justin Bieber to Russia!

   I'm beginning to understand why Ukraine vacation packages are being steeply discounted...

   Today, for the first time in history - France did not surrender!! They actually fought!

   If you invite a girl over to "watch a movie, have some drinks, talk" and actually watch a movie, chat and drink, then you're a failure as a man…

   Koran has been remixed more times than Madonna.

   If two Chocolate bars are stuck together it counts as one - so shut up please!

   When poverty comes in at the door, love flies out of the window.

   I'm beginning to understand why Syria, Raqqa 5-Star Al-Aladin VIP vacation packages are being steeply discounted....

   My girl got naked and asked me to "Show her a good time." So I showed her Facebook pics of me with my friends the night before...

   Hard to believe I once had a phone ATTACHED TO A WALL. It did not have Bluetooth, you could not take selfies on it or send any text messages... Even worse! When it rang I'd pick it up WITHOUT KNOWING WHO WAS CALLING. Amazing I'm still alive!

   Bikinis expose 90% of a woman's body, but men are so decent, polite and well-mannered that we only look at the remaining 10% that is covered..