Samir Momin Funny Status Messages

   loves how my gf calls me on her breaks. Which involves hearing courtesy flushes. Learn to break somewhere else.Thanks.

   You've been dating for 2 days - you don't love each other.... Shutup!

   Yes Officer...I did see the Speed Limit sign...I just didn't see YOU...

   Its funny how sitting "boy girl boy girl" use to be a punishment...

   When you're a fast texter, two minutes is a long time to wait for a reply....

   Why does it take longer to build a blond snowman???? Because you have to hollow the head out.....

   Its fun to see blue water turn green after I pee in it...see kids, science is fun...

   Skinny jeans aren't for everybody...

   What did the hurricane say 2 the coconut tree? Hold onto your nuts,this is no ordinary blow job...

   The pollen levels are so high this year that it has the crackheads trying to convert their meth back into Sudafed..

   He who fishes in another man's well often catches crab.....

   virginity is like a baloon... one prick and it's gone forever.....

   What do you call a black man flyin a plane???? A pilot you RACI$T !!!!

   Premature Ejaculation ads make car rides awkward.....

   Evening news is where they begin with 'Good evening', and then they proceed to tell you why it isn't.

   Considering the fact that god is the creator of everything....Does that mean he's chinese then.... ??

   Fool me once, shame on you. Fool me twice, I'm kicking your ass!

   Apple Bottom Jeans,Turban With The Fur,Got The Whole Mosque Looking At Her....

   Taking a picture of a flower does not make you a photographer......

   Rihanna wants a rude boy...Didnt she get her a$$ whooped by one already?