Prince Shawn Funny Status Messages

   prepared to kiss you whether you are Irish or not.

   Life is all about ass. Everyone's either covering it, laughing it off, kicking it, kissing it, trying to get a piece of it, or simply just being one.

   his relationship status set to "It's Complicated" simply because he can't decide on which hand to use.

   Jaywalking sounds like a stupid made up crime so I treat it like one. If you think I am walking an extra block to cross the street, you are out of your mind.

   Nothing is better than a woman getting in touch with herself. Especially if she lets me watch.

   Romance works because ladies love dumb stuff and they are easily swayed by meaningless gestures. That's why all dudes have the same technique. It's called lying.

   hanging out with his friends Mike Rotch and Jenny Talia.

   I always wanted to know how long 'forever' was and by looking at some people's relationships, it's around 3 to 4 weeks.

   sprung after seeing a girl walk in with an itty bitty waist and put a round thing in his face.

   when you're stressed, you eat Ice cream, cake, chocolate and sweets. Why? Because stressed spelled backwards is Desserts.

   used to arrive fashionably late to parties until he realized it didn't matter because the party only starts when he arrives.

   went to a carnival trying to win an X-box Kinect and the next thing he knew , he'd lost his entire life savings and all he had to show for it was a giant banana with dreadlocks.

   completely worn out after spending the whole weekend at a genital jamboree.

   had a job as a bartender once at a lesbian bar, but was fired after turning too many women straight.

   It's hard for me to take the things you say seriously when I know what's been in that mouth of yours.

   Thank you internet. before you came along, I had to stare out the window to laugh at strangers.

   has found that the best thing about dating a homeless woman is that when the night's over, you can drop her off anywhere.

   has pants that say Snickers on them because they are packed with nuts and they always satisfy.

   your outfit makes you look like a stripper. A high end stripper for governors and athletes, but a stripper nonetheless.

   Bert and Ernie are a perfect closeted TV couple. You are not sure they are gay, but you can't prove they aren't.