Marshall the Great Funny Status Messages



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   messageicon REALLY annoyed. I got asked to leave the supermarket for doing what one of their supid signs said: "Wet Floor." Bunch of retards.
←Rate | 03-27-2010 14:21 by Marshall the Great Comments (0)  


   messageicon I need some transition time from the weekend... can we drink during lunch breaks this week to get back to normal?
←Rate | 03-28-2010 18:17 by Marshall the Great Comments (0)  


   messageicon I saw a K9 sheriff car with a bumper sticker that said "Got dope?"
←Rate | 03-28-2010 18:50 by Marshall the Great Comments (0)  


   messageicon Sometimes when I see people I havent seen in a while, I think to myself... "Yeah... He's definitely been smoking crack."
←Rate | 03-28-2010 19:15 by Marshall the Great Comments (0)  


   messageicon Friend: Someone who draws on your face while passed out. True Friend: Someone who posts pictures of said drawings on Facebook.
←Rate | 03-28-2010 19:20 by Marshall the Great Comments (0)  


   messageicon This girl asked to take me out to dinner, I told her sorry I have a girlfriend. Her response... "Eatin' ain't cheatin'."
←Rate | 04-10-2010 13:25 by Marshall the Great Comments (1)  


   messageicon In the Beginning, God made the Heaven and Earth. The rest was Made in China.
←Rate | 04-10-2010 13:27 by Marshall the Great Comments (0)  


   messageicon I don't like how Facebook asks "What's on your mind?" I usually just lie and live with the guilt.
←Rate | 04-10-2010 13:28 by Marshall the Great Comments (1)  


   messageicon Actually it only takes me 1 drink to get drunk. The trouble is I can't remember if it's the 14th or 15th.
←Rate | 04-10-2010 13:31 by Marshall the Great Comments (0)  


   messageicon I wish I could google "things to eat in my fridge" so I wouldn't have to go downstairs and be disappointed.
←Rate | 04-10-2010 13:34 by Marshall the Great Comments (0)  


   messageicon On a scale of 1 to "Me".. how smart are you?
←Rate | 04-10-2010 13:38 by Marshall the Great Comments (0)  


   messageicon The biggest lie ever: I have read and agree to the terms of use.
←Rate | 04-10-2010 13:39 by Marshall the Great Comments (0)  


   messageicon Hand jobs are like the WNBA a cheap imitation of something that men do better.
←Rate | 04-10-2010 13:51 by Marshall the Great Comments (0)  


   messageicon Why do the guys at Footlocker get so mad when they can't force you to buy socks or extra shoe cleaner.
←Rate | 04-10-2010 14:01 by Marshall the Great Comments (3)  


   messageicon I love it when the person's laugh is funnier than the actual joke.
←Rate | 04-13-2010 19:58 by Marshall the Great Comments (0)  


   messageicon I do NOT have an attitude problem... Yes, I may have the attitude, but YOU'RE the one that seems to have a problem with it...
←Rate | 04-14-2010 13:50 by Marshall the Great Comments (0)  


   messageicon Adam's first words to Eve: "Stand back, I don`t know how big this thing gets!"
←Rate | 04-14-2010 13:51 by Marshall the Great Comments (0)  


   messageicon Don't hate me because I´m good, hate me because I know it!!!
←Rate | 04-14-2010 13:52 by Marshall the Great Comments (0)  


   messageicon Moving sucks! Why hasn't anyone invented Copy and Paste for real life?
←Rate | 04-14-2010 21:08 by Marshall the Great Comments (1)  


   messageicon Immediately like this status if you automatically restart a game when you know your gonna lose!
←Rate | 04-14-2010 21:09 by Marshall the Great Comments (0)  



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