K-Mac Funny Status Messages

   I need some quiet, alone time to comtemplate for a while. If you need me I'll be on MySpace.

   Once you lick the frosting off a cupcake it becomes a muffin....and muffins are healthy. Your welcome.

   Does anybody know where I could find out how much a footlong costs at Subway?

   Three blondes walk into a bar.....you'd think one of them would have seen it.

   I have Super-glue and a non-stick pan.....lets see who wins.

   I'm having doubts about that dehydrated water I bought for my plastic plants.

   Wow, that one was so bad, all four cats left the room.

   Tomorrow's going to be great.....Discount candy.

   Sometimes I wish animals could talk....then I remember all the things my cats have seen me do when I'm alone and I'm very grateful they can't.

   One things for sure, I can always count on my fingers.

   Went to Wal-Mart in my painting clothes today....still the best dressed person in there.

   Wow....turns out I'm NOT a Ninja. That really hurt.

   Mondays are like sandpaper for the soul.

   Gotta love Facebook. I can update my status, post pictures and even chat with numerous people.....and nobody knows I'm not wearing any pants.

   What if Deja Vu means you lost a life and started at the last checkpoint

   I'm taking a First Aid training course with CPR this afternoon. Starting tomorrow you can address me as Doctor.

   That terrifying moment when your cat walks into the room, stares at something you can't see and runs away in a panic.

   Gas prices are so high...I saw a street gang doing a walk-by

   The one reason I could never become a vegetarian....Bacon.

   Why do we feel safe under a blanket? It's not like a murderer will come thinking "I'm going to ki....Oh damn they're under a blanket!"