Zinc Funny Status Messages



Sort:  Recent   |   Oldest   |   Rating
Filter On | Filter Off | No Trump


Search Messages:
[Clear]

Search results for status messages containing 'Zinc': View All Messages
Page: 5 of 8

   messageicon Baseball was made for kids, and grown-ups only screw it up. ~Bob Lemon
←Rate | 10-18-2015 23:09 by Zinc Comments (0)  


   messageicon I spend a lot of time holding the refrigerator door open looking for the answer.
←Rate | 02-24-2015 18:12 by Zinc Comments (0)  


   messageicon I'm going to celebrate Cinco de Mayo by puking tequila and gorditas on the side of a Taco Bell. i
←Rate | 05-03-2017 18:25 by Zinc Comments (0)  


   messageicon Cinco de Mayo makes me long for a world in which all holidays are conveniently named after the dates on which they fall.
←Rate | 05-03-2017 18:26 by Zinc Comments (0)  


   messageicon just read a book about Stockholm Syndrome. It started off badly but by the end I really liked it.
←Rate | 03-16-2012 03:56 by Zinc Comments (0)  


   messageicon Did anyone ever tell those kids how to get to sesame street?
←Rate | 12-30-2011 01:50 by Zinc Comments (0)  


   messageicon People ask me why I don’t have any tattoos and I respond with, would you put a bumper sticker on a Ferrari?
←Rate | 03-17-2016 12:10 by Zinc Comments (0)  


   messageicon You can't buy happiness but you can buy weed and that is pretty close.
←Rate | 04-18-2017 22:52 by Zinc Comments (0)  


   messageicon It’s May 4 soon, the one day of the year when Star Wars fans celebrate being able to use quite possibly the best pun in the world: “May the Fourth be with you”.
←Rate | 05-01-2017 17:01 by Zinc Comments (2)  


   messageicon Whenever anyone mentions something about a vicious cycle, I imagine an evil bike that can't stop killing.
←Rate | 04-03-2013 01:38 by Zinc Comments (0)  


   messageicon Sometimes, when I'm feeling down because nothing seems to be going right, I like to take a home pregnancy test. Then I can say, "Hey, at least I'm not pregnant." And I know happy days are around the corner. --daniel tosh
←Rate | 04-03-2013 01:48 by Zinc Comments (0)  


   messageicon Say no to drugs. Although, if you're talking to drugs, it may be too late.
←Rate | 03-16-2012 03:58 by Zinc Comments (0)  


   messageicon I've survived enough awkward high-fives to know they're not worth the risk
←Rate | 01-11-2015 21:02 by Zinc Comments (0)  


   messageicon I just poured superglue into a non-stick pan. Someone's going to be wrong.
←Rate | 05-28-2013 01:09 by Zinc Comments (0)  


   messageicon "You want proof that baseball players are smarter than football players? How often do you see a baseball team penalized for too many men on the field?" ~Jim Bouton
←Rate | 10-18-2015 23:14 by Zinc Comments (0)  


   messageicon My parent's kitchen was designed with 11 light switches, all of which turn on the garbage disposal if you're trying to be quiet
←Rate | 01-11-2015 21:04 by Zinc Comments (0)  


   messageicon Khakis: What you need to start a car in Boston.
←Rate | 05-22-2013 00:39 by Zinc Comments (0)  


   messageicon thinks Google Maps needs an "Avoid Ghetto" option.
←Rate | 03-16-2012 04:00 by Zinc Comments (0)  


   messageicon I totally get why women are attracted to men who ride motorcycles. Like you increase your chances of getting to have two husbands by a lot.
←Rate | 09-23-2015 22:58 by Zinc Comments (0)  


   messageicon undefeated at BattleShip. Mostly because I stack my ships on top of one another.
←Rate | 12-30-2011 01:48 by Zinc Comments (0)  



[Search Results] [View All Messages]
Submit your own funny facebook status message here:
Name:
Status Message:

... characters left