Funny Status Messages and Tweets
Funny Status Messages for Facebook, Discord, and Whatsapp and funny tweets for Twitter.
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People shouldn't be judged by who they date, what skin color they are, and etc..If they are happy together, then let them live their lives..
Take the chance, live out your dreams, make life better than it seems.
Love is like a rubber band. At first we keep on pulling and pulling. Then when someone let go, it hurts the person who holds on.
There's 8 letters in I LOVE YOU but there's also 8 letters in BULLSH!T!
What happens in an exam : Tik tok, Mind block, Pen stop, Eye pop, Full shock, Jaw drop, Time up, No Luck.
Heart breaks are like a broken mirror, you can still put the pieces together, but the cracks will still remain.
Everything happens for a reason & sometimes it's better for us not to know that reason.
I dont mind going to work, but this eight hour wait to go home is bullsh*t
sorry babe, I'm not lighting candles to be romantic.......lighting candles cause I just took a dump
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06-14-2011 16:24
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I miss that age when I THOUGHT I knew everything. Cause now that I do, it's kinda depressing...
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06-14-2011 16:13
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so this lady is buying a birthday card and diet suppliments, cant help but wonder if these items are not related or if she's just a b!tch
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06-14-2011 16:11 by Sean
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Looks like Hugh Hefner's fiance finally got her cataracts removed and called off the wedding realizing she'd have to wake up everyday next to a dude that looks worse than the dead guy on "A Weekend at Bernie's"
When someone from customer service says, "that is an excellent question"... they're basically saying they don't have a clue about the answer.
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06-14-2011 15:56
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I hate trying new clothes on in the dressing room and then looking at yourself in the mirror after putting your old clothes back on.
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06-14-2011 15:08 by marq
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The minute people fall in love they become liars
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06-14-2011 14:34
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I am watching a homeless dude outside of a building using his reflection in the window to help him shave.
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06-14-2011 14:16
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if our women with babies use little spoons and forks to feed them. what do chinese people use? tooth picks?
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06-14-2011 13:45 by MTQ
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Went to Walmart in my bum yard work clothes today ..but strangley did not feel out of place...
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06-14-2011 13:43
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Boy are there ever a lot of garages for sale in my neighbour hood..
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06-14-2011 13:40
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I love how my laptopshasta a warning that says You should change your battery or switch to outlet power immediately to keep from losing your work. Lol "work". I wish I got paid to watch porn..
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06-14-2011 13:31 by Jackbrass
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