Steve OH Funny Status Messages

   Just finished shoveling 6 inches of snow off my lawn. Then I mowed it.

   I always knew those people signing at major events were just fakes!!!

   Do you have to water a Pointsettia or do they die on their own?

   that all you got? Come on Mother Nature, put your big girl panties on!!

   My stock in Johnny Walker is through the roof!!!

   First rule of Vegan Club... Tell everyone.

   Sick and tired of the Dr. Phil test!!! BTW, I scored a 47.

   How do I stay fit and healthy? By drinking vodka and pushing kids off bikes.

   This outbreak of storms is like p or n to the meteorologist's!!!

   12 things about me. 7- I can't count.

   Nothing honors our Vetrans more than buying a mattress on sale.

   I think we're old enough for a Karate Chop button on Facebook.

   How can you complain for 11 months then be thankful on Facebook for 30 days???

   So am I on Facebook or is everyone updating their Sports Annalist resume?

   Thank you all for the Happy Birthday wishes!!! Had a GREAT DAY!!! (didn't read a single one)

   I think you people lied to me...exactly how much of this hair of the dog do I have to eat before this hangover goes away?

   I'm going to trade in my "I'm stupid" t-shirt for the fancy "I'm with stupid" one.

   it okay to text my kids not to come home cause i'm gonna do their mom? I mean, it is 2013... RIGHT?

   So I'm reading that "twerking" and "selfie" have been added to the dictionary. "Future" and "optimism" have been removed...

   Asked my wife to try A nal and she turned into the rhubarb lady...