Danmanz Funny Status Messages



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   messageicon Thank you Pringles® for being the only chip company that doesn't sell air.
←Rate | 01-28-2013 01:39 by Danmanz Comments (0)  


   messageicon "Watch what the idiots are doing and do the opposite." ~ Robert Kiyosaki
←Rate | 01-16-2013 02:26 by Danmanz Comments (0)  


   messageicon Sugar Babies --- College girls hooking up with older men to pay their tuition.
←Rate | 01-14-2013 22:58 by Danmanz Comments (0)  


   messageicon 50% of marriages end in divorce and the other 50% end by a "relationship status" on facebook.
←Rate | 01-13-2013 02:20 by Danmanz Comments (0)  


   messageicon You take the Kennedy assassination + That Clinton and Lewinsky thing + A pretty boss lady with small, slutty tendencies and BAM...You got a show on ABC called Scandal.
←Rate | 01-10-2013 19:59 by Danmanz Comments (0)  


   messageicon If you're on facebook saying you're at the gym, then you're not doing anything gym related.
←Rate | 01-08-2013 17:19 by Danmanz Comments (0)  


   messageicon I refuse to lower my standards to accommodate those who refuse to raise theirs.
←Rate | 01-04-2013 23:13 by Danmanz Comments (0)  


   messageicon Make sure your worst enemy is not living between your own two ears.
←Rate | 01-04-2013 23:12 by Danmanz Comments (0)  


   messageicon Facebook (FB) + Instagram (I) = FBI............."They" are watching you.
←Rate | 01-03-2013 16:42 by Danmanz Comments (0)  


   messageicon *Achievement Unlocked* 15G - Reading This Status All The Way
←Rate | 01-02-2013 09:30 by Danmanz Comments (0)  


   messageicon Up to this year, there's a reality T.V. show about everything except reality.
←Rate | 12-28-2012 17:47 by Danmanz Comments (0)  


   messageicon The internet does not make people ignorant, it just makes their ignorance visible to everyone else.
←Rate | 12-17-2012 18:07 by Danmanz Comments (0)  


   messageicon You never heard or seen a pothead come home and beat his wife have you?
←Rate | 11-29-2012 13:02 by Danmanz Comments (0)  


   messageicon Reality T.V. Show Idea: Put The Kardashians, Honey Boo Boo, and the Jersey Shore cast on a island. Have them fight it out until the last one stands and call it "Who Gives A Fu¢k"
←Rate | 11-29-2012 12:49 by Danmanz Comments (0)  


   messageicon That nervous moment when we're at a Fiscal Cliff and Obama's campaign slogan is "Forward"
←Rate | 11-29-2012 12:44 by Danmanz Comments (0)  


   messageicon It's Thanksgiving. Don't forget to set your scale forward 45 lbs. ahead.
←Rate | 11-22-2012 00:11 by Danmanz Comments (1)  


   messageicon If the head of the CIA (Petraeus) can't keep a secret such as cheating on his wife, then they're screwed.
←Rate | 11-09-2012 23:46 by Danmanz Comments (0)  


   messageicon If you decide to dress up as Lance Armstrong for this Halloween, just remember to give all the candy back at the end of the night.
←Rate | 10-31-2012 00:48 by Danmanz Comments (0)  


   messageicon My homework brings all the Asians to the yard, and they're like "It wasn't that hard"
←Rate | 10-27-2012 15:31 by Danmanz Comments (0)  


   messageicon Dear Taliban, When you shoot a kid in the head for wanting an education and she doesn't die, how can you be sure that God is on your side?
←Rate | 10-26-2012 14:13 by Danmanz Comments (2)  




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