Maureen Funny Status Messages



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   messageicon When I die, I have made my husband promise to update my FB status with “Who knew they had Wi-Fi up here?!?”
←Rate | 03-23-2012 15:39 by Maureen Comments (0)  


   messageicon thinks my three “uh huhs” in a row should prove that I haven't heard a word you said!
←Rate | 03-23-2012 15:41 by Maureen Comments (0)  


   messageicon just finishing up my taxes and am now a little worried about my tax software. It just recommended I slip across the border into Mexico.
←Rate | 04-01-2012 22:31 by Maureen Comments (0)  


   messageicon NOTE TO SELF – Do NOT set your password reminder as “You Should Know This!!”
←Rate | 04-02-2012 11:25 by Maureen Comments (0)  


   messageicon Why won't the machines just take over already? I'm tired of doing stuff.
←Rate | 04-02-2012 11:25 by Maureen Comments (0)  


   messageicon Hey Customer Service - Instead of monitoring this call for quality purposes, how about you just listen to what I need and fix it?!?
←Rate | 04-11-2012 19:42 by Maureen Comments (0)  


   messageicon does my BEST proofreading right after I hit send!
←Rate | 04-11-2012 20:36 by Maureen Comments (0)  


   messageicon Denial, anger, bargaining, depression, and acceptance: the five stages of me getting up every morning!
←Rate | 04-11-2012 20:39 by Maureen Comments (0)  


   messageicon My son just tried to claim that his room is not messy…that it is merely set up in obstacle-like manner to keep him fit.
←Rate | 04-11-2012 22:50 by Maureen Comments (0)  


   messageicon tries to read books that will make me look good if I die in the middle of reading them.
←Rate | 04-17-2012 11:31 by Maureen Comments (0)  


   messageicon Dear Karma – I have a list of a few people you missed. Sincerely, Me
←Rate | 04-19-2012 23:48 by Maureen Comments (0)  


   messageicon If you say “gullible” slow enough…it sounds like “orange”!
←Rate | 04-19-2012 23:48 by Maureen Comments (0)  


   messageicon My favorite yoga pose is the one where I stand upright, watching the class through the window while eating a cheeseburger.
←Rate | 04-26-2012 20:49 by Maureen Comments (0)  


   messageicon There are times I'll make up words and slip them into conversations just to see if anyone is actually protempifying to what I'm saying.
←Rate | 04-26-2012 21:48 by Maureen Comments (0)  


   messageicon Hitting the treadmill to release stress is not nearly as effective as hitting the people that cause the stress.......
←Rate | 06-11-2012 22:37 by Maureen Comments (0)  


   messageicon has found my age is very inappropriate for my behavior.
←Rate | 06-12-2012 21:32 by Maureen Comments (0)  


   messageicon living in a van down by the river!
←Rate | 06-12-2012 21:34 by Maureen Comments (0)  


   messageicon Woke up this morning swearing I could smell pancakes, but it seems I was just smellucinating.
←Rate | 06-21-2012 15:37 by Maureen Comments (0)  


   messageicon would like to go see Magic Mike, but only to explore the narrative, artistic, cultural, economic, and political implications of the film.
←Rate | 07-09-2012 14:37 by Maureen Comments (0)  


   messageicon so passed caring about how I dress any more. I just put on whatever makes me not naked and hope for the best
←Rate | 07-18-2012 20:37 by Maureen Comments (0)  




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