Bryan j brown Funny Status Messages



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   messageicon You know your in the south when you can get your fried chicken and gas at the same store...
←Rate | 09-25-2011 12:05 by bryan j brown Comments (0)  


   messageicon I have all these kung-fu skills and no ninjas too fight...I'm starting too think I'm living in the wrong city....
←Rate | 12-26-2010 15:29 by bryan j brown Comments (0)  


   messageicon Lazy Rule #227- I only buy Peanut Butter & Jelly when its swirled together cuz I aint got no time for all that two jar sh*t...
←Rate | 02-28-2012 10:38 by bryan j brown Comments (0)  


   messageicon I gots to say nothing turns me on more then looking at some of these pics on facebook of these chicks flippin the bird....I mean its so dang sexy...Its the kinda pic you can show your grandkids and tell them thats how you fell for their grandma..
←Rate | 11-30-2010 13:20 by bryan j brown Comments (0)  


   messageicon Its sad that at a certain point some peoples promises just start too sound like Charlie Brown's Teacher..."Wah wah wah wah wah wah"
←Rate | 09-04-2011 00:06 by bryan j brown Comments (0)  


   messageicon Just remember nobody's perfect...Cuz i'm sure even Mother Teresa blamed her fart on a kid or two...
←Rate | 11-13-2011 21:29 by bryan j brown Comments (0)  


   messageicon Oh snap if gas gets below $3 a gallon looks like I can start dating girls out side my city limits....Whoop Whoop
←Rate | 11-25-2011 19:05 by bryan j brown Comments (0)  


   messageicon So if Justin Bieber has his own cologne...I def think its about time I came up with one of my own..Not sure what too call it tho..They say you should name it after things you like..So I am really leaning toward naming it "Ode to BoobiesVajayjayNinjaFight"
←Rate | 06-23-2011 16:55 by bryan j brown Comments (0)  


   messageicon They truly don't make movies like they use too...When I was a kid movies had values, morals and ethics...And without these great movies how would I have ever known that I "Don't Tell Mom the Babysitter's Dead"...
←Rate | 08-01-2011 20:46 by bryan j brown Comments (0)  


   messageicon I bet people in jail don't use scented body wash...Cuz the last thing you want is some dude rolling up on you talking bout, "Sniff sniff...You smell like Cherry Fruit Passion".....
←Rate | 09-17-2011 14:10 by bryan j brown Comments (0)  


   messageicon Satisfied isnt her telling you how great you were afterwards....Satisfied is her being unable too speak afterwards...I Do Work Son!!
←Rate | 06-04-2011 20:15 by bryan j brown Comments (0)  


   messageicon A bird in the hand is worth two in the bush...heheheehe...I said bush:)
←Rate | 11-21-2010 22:48 by bryan j brown Comments (0)  


   messageicon If you gotta ask her "Does this feel good??" you aint doin it right....
←Rate | 10-29-2011 18:09 by bryan j brown Comments (0)  


   messageicon Man Law #236: Unless you last name is "Van Damme" grown a$$ men don't do the splits...
←Rate | 10-08-2011 14:06 by bryan j brown Comments (0)  


   messageicon They say Hard times don't last forever...So someone might wanna tell Hard times that :/
←Rate | 07-12-2011 01:02 by bryan j brown Comments (0)  


   messageicon Mary Poppins did a great job getting kids to take there meds...Cause a spoon full of sugar really does help the medicine go down... Its just too bad all the kids she watched got Type 2 diabetes now...
←Rate | 11-10-2010 10:09 by bryan j brown Comments (0)  


   messageicon Sometimes when I'm bored I take red and blue M&Ms and walk up to random people...And try too convince them that one of them will get'em out the Matrix.....
←Rate | 12-03-2010 12:32 by bryan j brown Comments (0)  


   messageicon Yowers...You know the way she keeps trying to Double Dare me...I'm think she's wants to Take the Physical Challenge
←Rate | 01-19-2011 16:18 by bryan j brown Comments (0)  


   messageicon Bryan Brown ‎"Can I see your phone??" SURE.. Just don't look in my contacts.... or my texts... or my pics.. or my videos... or my.. you know what just give me my damn phone back.. #Mr.Brown
←Rate | 08-22-2012 20:00 by bryan j brown Comments (0)  


   messageicon I think I need a catch phrase after sex...Something like "You've just been blessed!!" or "And now you know...And knowing is half the battle!!" or my personal favorite "Shazaam!!"
←Rate | 07-21-2011 19:39 by bryan j brown Comments (0)  




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