Funny Status Messages and Tweets

Funny Status Messages for Facebook, Discord, and Whatsapp and funny tweets for Twitter.

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   messageicon I wonder if the guy that changes Casey Anthony's oil knows a thing or two about brakes and being a national hero?
←Rate | 07-16-2011 11:15 Comments (0)  


   messageicon “Even in a happy relationship, it's seems to be possible to have a wandering eye or even crave affection from another person.
←Rate | 07-19-2010 22:09 by abbybaby34 Comments (0)  


   messageicon I was so depressed last night and called a Suicide Hotline. I had to press 1 for English. I was connected to a call center in Pakistan. I told them I was suicidal. They got excited and asked if I could drive a truck….
←Rate | 10-24-2010 07:46 by thullqst Comments (3)  


   messageicon I'm wondering what we can trade Obama for ???
←Rate | 06-06-2014 08:49 Comments (0)  


   messageicon I'd imagine that muslim sex dolls blow themselves up.
←Rate | 04-01-2012 10:37 by Baddie Comments (0)  


   messageicon Gee. Lets ask an openly christian man who owns a chain of restaurants that are closed on Sunday what his beliefs on gay marriage are, then act surprised when we find out his beliefs.... Idiots.
←Rate | 07-27-2012 22:42 by Michael Comments (1)  


   messageicon purposely pouring water on Gremlins
←Rate | 05-08-2008 21:23 Comments (0)  


   messageicon processing please wait
←Rate | 12-06-2008 16:19 by Mehmet Onur Comments (0)  


   messageicon Jesus, take the wheel. My beer just rolled under the seat..
←Rate | 01-20-2011 15:43 by Aaron Comments (1)  


   messageicon Verizon's new slogan: Kenya hear me now.
←Rate | 06-10-2013 11:13 Comments (0)  


   messageicon [How Most Wars Have Started Between Countries] "You believe in God?", "No" , (BANG!!). or "You believe in God?" , "Yes" , "You believe in MY God?" , "No" , (BANG!!)
←Rate | 08-26-2011 12:18 by Danmanz Comments (0)  


   messageicon I just googled 2013 and it said the new Batman movie comes out SO TAKE THAT MAYANS.
←Rate | 02-21-2011 19:30 by abbybaby34 Comments (0)  


   messageicon I've Decided To Get MARRIED :All Women May Now FORM AN ORDERLY LINE...... .. Only The Most Beautiful Or The Very Rich Women Need Apply . . Please Send Me A Private Message With Your Photo or A copy Of Your Bank Balance ,The Winner Will Notified By email
←Rate | 12-19-2010 08:41 by Danny Comments (6)  


   messageicon I saw an Indian guy violently shaking a rug, I suppose to clean it. I couldn't help myself, I asked "Can't get it started?"
←Rate | 06-08-2010 19:04 Comments (0)  


   messageicon She is so slutty, her facebook wall has a glory hole!
←Rate | 09-20-2010 18:38 Comments (0)  


   messageicon Spiderman isnt the only one that gets sticky hands after using the Web all day...... If you know what I mean ;)
←Rate | 09-08-2012 20:28 by jitney Comments (0)  


   messageicon Omicron and Delta is an anagram for Media Control.
←Rate | 12-06-2021 16:27 Comments (0)  


   messageicon I told my wife when I said I liked it rough I didn't mean my whole life.
←Rate | 03-02-2022 13:17 Comments (0)  


   messageicon Dear Taylor Swift, Kanye took your microphone not your virginity. Let's move on...
←Rate | 10-24-2010 14:52 Comments (0)  


   messageicon says, forgive your enemies, but remember their names.
←Rate | 12-25-2009 17:46 by mullerman Comments (0)  




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