Mick F Funny Status Messages



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   messageicon :E (Guy who doesn't know how to twirl spaghetti).
←Rate | 10-19-2011 05:27 by Mick F Comments (0)  


   messageicon :B (Guy with buck teeth).
←Rate | 10-19-2011 05:26 by Mick F Comments (0)  


   messageicon The Obamas are on vacation. Someone send a cop car by the White House to make sure Biden wasn't left home alone.
←Rate | 10-19-2011 05:25 by Mick F Comments (0)  


   messageicon This just in. The following have been arrested for selling counterfeit pizza. Papa John-Hungry Howie-Little Caesar-Cici-Domino-and Chuck E. Cheese. Tear gas was used to bring them out of their hiding place...Pizza Hut.
←Rate | 10-17-2011 20:24 by Mick F Comments (0)  


   messageicon The Rockin' Praise band at your hypocritical Creep Me Out Church doesn't exactly make your ancient 13th century worldview progressive.
←Rate | 10-17-2011 19:34 by Mick F Comments (0)  


   messageicon I saw two kids today texting each other on their cell phones while standing maybe two feet away from each other. Dear Future: I'm sorry.
←Rate | 10-17-2011 19:12 by Mick F Comments (0)  


   messageicon She won't let me warm my icicle feet on her toasty inner thighs due to the availability of a technology called "socks." WHATEVER.
←Rate | 10-17-2011 17:17 by Mick F Comments (0)  


   messageicon I don't friend request someone just because they have a pretty face. I friend request them if they have a pretty face and big t*ts.
←Rate | 10-15-2011 23:50 by Mick F Comments (0)  


   messageicon A little old man shuffled slowly into an ice cream parlor and pulled himself slowly, painfully, up onto a stool. After catching his breath he ordered a banana split. The waitress asked, "Crushed nuts?" " He goes, "No, arthritis."
←Rate | 10-13-2011 13:53 by Mick F Comments (0)  


   messageicon Buckwheat Word Of The Day: Dictate "I aks Darla wen she give me a bIow job how my dictate."
←Rate | 10-12-2011 18:41 by Mick F Comments (0)  


   messageicon My daughter came home from school and said that a boy showed her his pen!s. She said it reminded her of a peanut. I said, "Why, was it small? She said, "No, it was salty."
←Rate | 10-12-2011 06:06 by Mick F Comments (0)  


   messageicon Psychiatric labels are nice way of sugar coating the fact that some people are just plain a$$holes.
←Rate | 10-11-2011 10:40 by Mick F Comments (0)  


   messageicon ...Unique is an understatement, I'm just plain ol' messed up.
←Rate | 10-10-2011 07:19 by Mick F Comments (0)  


   messageicon Don't you hate sitting in a chair after someone gets up and it feels like their a$$ must've been under a broiler?
←Rate | 10-09-2011 19:33 by Mick F Comments (0)  


   messageicon McDonald's is down to their last pound of ground beef. That should be good for another million burgers.
←Rate | 10-09-2011 08:23 by Mick F Comments (0)  


   messageicon Wishing all my facebook friends a fantasmagorical weekend filled with fun, sun, and...hang on a sec....huh?....okay, it's supposed to rain all weekend so never mind.
←Rate | 10-08-2011 06:22 by Mick F Comments (0)  


   messageicon Drugs may be the road to nowhere, but at least they're the scenic route.
←Rate | 10-07-2011 17:36 by Mick F Comments (0)  


   messageicon Once upon a time, many, many years ago in a galaxy far, far away, I was in the Boy Scouts. I slipped on a banana peel, hurt my ankle and a little old lady had to help me cross the street.
←Rate | 10-07-2011 10:31 by Mick F Comments (0)  


   messageicon The idiot that wrote about the "Porshes and Mexicans" knows how to spell Porsche.
←Rate | 10-06-2011 10:01 by Mick F Comments (0)  


   messageicon All 911 decals have been removed from Police cars in an effort to dissuade Mexicans from stealing them who think they're Porsches.
←Rate | 10-06-2011 07:40 by Mick F Comments (0)  




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