Kisstopher Funny Status Messages



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   messageicon If you love someone set them free. If they comeback, probably it was a Fast & The Furious Movie.
←Rate | 04-10-2013 12:37 by Kisstopher Comments (0)  


   messageicon She: Your cute. Me: My cute what?
←Rate | 04-10-2013 12:26 by Kisstopher Comments (0)  


   messageicon I'm such a giving person; if cannibals were cooking me, I'd give them tips on how to make me more tender.
←Rate | 04-08-2013 14:19 by Kisstopher Comments (0)  


   messageicon Trillions of stars. Billions of galaxies. So many civilizations. But you’ll never explore one. You’re stuck here on earth hearing about the damn Kardashians.
←Rate | 04-08-2013 00:56 by Kisstopher Comments (0)  


   messageicon Forget North Korea and America, the next nuclear war will be between your lips and mine...tonite.
←Rate | 04-05-2013 15:20 by Kisstopher Comments (0)  


   messageicon I’m so glad I found you in all this wreckage of a planet.
←Rate | 04-05-2013 14:23 by Kisstopher Comments (0)  


   messageicon I think i'm in pizza with you.
←Rate | 04-05-2013 13:19 by Kisstopher Comments (0)  


   messageicon Told my dealer I wanted a sh*tload of Coke but auto-correct changed it to shipload now I owe a Colombian cartel 18 million dollars.
←Rate | 04-05-2013 07:33 by Kisstopher Comments (0)  


   messageicon I can’t control you're being an idiot, but I can control whether or not you’re on my friends list.
←Rate | 04-04-2013 14:12 by Kisstopher Comments (0)  


   messageicon What doesn't kill you get arrested and most likely post bail.
←Rate | 04-04-2013 13:57 by Kisstopher Comments (0)  


   messageicon Walking away from a senseless arguments, makes sense to me!
←Rate | 04-04-2013 07:24 by Kisstopher Comments (0)  


   messageicon My safe word is "eww."
←Rate | 04-04-2013 07:20 by Kisstopher Comments (0)  


   messageicon Gun control is like trying to reduce drunk driving by making it tougher for sober people to own cars.
←Rate | 04-02-2013 03:23 by Kisstopher Comments (0)  


   messageicon How many times do you need the same person to piss in your mouth before you figure out urine doesn’t taste good?
←Rate | 03-31-2013 09:40 by Kisstopher Comments (0)  


   messageicon After sex, I've the same problem as a murderer; what to do with the body.
←Rate | 03-29-2013 15:22 by Kisstopher Comments (0)  


   messageicon Yes I stalk you, but only as a friend.
←Rate | 03-28-2013 13:30 by Kisstopher Comments (0)  


   messageicon You say alcohol abuse, I say this alcohol is getting exactly what it deserves.
←Rate | 03-28-2013 12:18 by Kisstopher Comments (0)  


   messageicon My signature move is falling in love with people I can't have.
←Rate | 03-28-2013 05:10 by Kisstopher Comments (0)  


   messageicon Don't text and drive. You don't want "lol" to be the last thing you say before you die.
←Rate | 03-28-2013 04:54 by Kisstopher Comments (0)  


   messageicon What if you just started licking the dentist fingers while they were in your mouth.
←Rate | 03-28-2013 04:48 by Kisstopher Comments (0)  


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