JMartin Funny Status Messages



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   messageicon One of my favorite things about this time of year is seeing all the pictures of children screaming in sheer terror as their parents try to capture that special moment with Santa.
←Rate | 12-19-2012 09:20 by JMartin Comments (0)  


   messageicon Arguing with strangers on the internet is like the Special Olympics. You might win, but you're still retarded! :)
←Rate | 12-27-2012 20:58 by JMartin Comments (0)  


   messageicon The only resolution I've ever managed to stick with, was when I resolved not to make resolutions I can't stick with.
←Rate | 12-31-2012 13:08 by JMartin Comments (0)  


   messageicon My new years resolution for 2013? I will be less laz
←Rate | 12-31-2012 13:21 by JMartin Comments (0)  


   messageicon I can't believe it's been a whole year since I didn't become a better person!
←Rate | 12-31-2012 13:23 by JMartin Comments (0)  


   messageicon Happy New Year everybody! I know its a bit early but I often suffer from premature congratulations.
←Rate | 12-31-2012 13:24 by JMartin Comments (0)  


   messageicon Rick Astley will let you borrow any movie from his Pixar collection except for one. He's never gonna give you Up.
←Rate | 01-05-2013 13:52 by JMartin Comments (0)  


   messageicon When I stay at a man's house that I want to see again I always "accidentally" lose something there, like my phone, my sweater, or my dignity.
←Rate | 01-11-2013 20:12 by JMartin Comments (0)  


   messageicon If one more person calls me dramatic, I swear to Christ I'm going to burn the world down.
←Rate | 01-11-2013 20:12 by JMartin Comments (0)  


   messageicon As income tax time approaches, did you ever notice that when you put the two words, 'The' and 'IRS' together, it spells THEIRS?
←Rate | 01-11-2013 20:13 by JMartin Comments (0)  


   messageicon If video games have taught me anything, it's that you'll automatically get promoted if you kill your boss.
←Rate | 01-11-2013 20:14 by JMartin Comments (0)  



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