StonerDudee Funny Status Messages



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   messageicon Jersey Shore just got cancelled. Clearly an act of God. Your move, atheists.
←Rate | 08-30-2012 20:54 by StonerDudee Comments (0)  


   messageicon Pepsi and Coke can't even be in the same restaurant together and society wants us all to get along. Pffftt.
←Rate | 01-03-2015 17:58 by StonerDudee Comments (0)  


   messageicon The Discovery Channel should be on a different channel every day.
←Rate | 09-14-2012 23:57 by StonerDudee Comments (3)  


   messageicon I wouldn't make it very long as a tattoo artist because I would always be asking "You're kidding me, right, you want that?"
←Rate | 05-13-2013 19:15 by StonerDudee Comments (0)  


   messageicon Research shows that, when someone shouts "Oh no he didn't!", he in fact did.
←Rate | 12-15-2012 18:47 by StonerDudee Comments (0)  


   messageicon Of all the utensils that were invented to eat rice with... How the f**k did two sticks win?
←Rate | 02-09-2013 10:51 by StonerDudee Comments (0)  


   messageicon Nothing says "I've already given up on this day" quite like a Taco Bell breakfast.
←Rate | 10-21-2014 14:38 by StonerDudee Comments (0)  


   messageicon If you ever feel unconfident in your body, just remember that pornhub wouldn't keep their fat girl category if guys didn't like it and it wasn't making them money.
←Rate | 02-04-2014 00:40 by StonerDudee Comments (0)  


   messageicon Long busy day, I need one of those hugs that turns into sex.
←Rate | 06-18-2012 16:10 by StonerDudee Comments (0)  


   messageicon Does this 50 pound bag of cat food make me look single?
←Rate | 02-24-2013 22:08 by StonerDudee Comments (0)  


   messageicon Nothing's more embarrassing than that pantsless walk to get more toilet paper. I felt like everyone in CVS was staring at me.
←Rate | 08-19-2012 10:05 by StonerDudee Comments (1)  


   messageicon Job applications are stupid. "Why do you want to work for us?" Oh, I've always had a passion for frozen yogurt.....b*tch I'm broke!!
←Rate | 07-01-2013 10:58 by StonerDudee Comments (0)  


   messageicon You took the time to make your minivan look like a reindeer but you can't take one second to hit the turn signal an inch from your fingers?
←Rate | 12-18-2014 16:58 by StonerDudee Comments (0)  


   messageicon Idk what was worse, the fact that my girlfriend text me saying "sorry breaking up with you" or that a minute later she text me back "sorry wrong number."
←Rate | 05-11-2013 19:45 by StonerDudee Comments (0)  


   messageicon Sometimes I feel like a loser for spending so much time on Facebook. Then I remember there are people out there who comment on pornhub videos
←Rate | 04-23-2015 10:46 by StonerDudee Comments (0)  


   messageicon Only a few years ago, the average parents had four children. Nowadays, the average child has four parents.
←Rate | 01-29-2014 13:06 by StonerDudee Comments (0)  


   messageicon Found a bag of marijuana at work last week, and like any responsible employee, I disposed of it. In a series of small fires
←Rate | 04-16-2013 13:49 by StonerDudee Comments (0)  


   messageicon This morning I got in touch with my inner self. And that's also the last time I'll buy cheap toilet paper...
←Rate | 09-06-2012 17:10 by StonerDudee Comments (0)  


   messageicon One day when someone rings my doorbell I'm gonna stand by the window with a straight face and just stare at them to see what they would do
←Rate | 10-19-2012 10:16 by StonerDudee Comments (0)  


   messageicon If you want a cream pie recipe you just type cream pie in Google and WAIT GRANDMA NO!!!
←Rate | 08-06-2012 13:33 by StonerDudee Comments (0)  




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