Me Funny Status Messages

   just heard Miley Cyrus is releasing a new song and dedicating it to Perez Hilton...it's called "Party In The Cell Block A"......

   I disagree... It's going to be a Great Friday!

   "Porn Actor Kills Colleague With Prop Weapon." It was apparently not a banana in his pocket, nor was he happy to see him.

   Studies show that California has the highest rate of Adultery and Depression....It's a sad State of affairs.

   gonna party like it's 1929.

   Catholic." ... ... ... He says, "Yes, I'm single & Catholic!" The nun kisses the driver then asks why he is crying. I lied. I must confess I'm married & I'm Jewish." The nun says, "That's OK, my name is Kevin & I'm going to a Halloween party!"

   Ryan Braun - way to beat the "guilty until proven innocent" rap!!

   So you saw my new boyfriend and ask me what happened to my standards? Well duh .. I raised them!!!

   What's the big deal about the Facebook changes? This is a free social media site you chose to use. Get over it or don't use it....seems simple to me

   im gassy while watching the news... imma go occupy the toilet