Kisstopher707 Funny Status Messages



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   messageicon Yes girl you can cook, give great head, have a great sense of fashion, are kind, beautiful, sexy, and have a great smile but can you twerk?
←Rate | 08-19-2013 12:16 by Kisstopher707 Comments (0)  


   messageicon We used to watch the news to find out the truth. If you're looking for the truth now, the last thing you'd want to watch is the news.
←Rate | 08-18-2013 11:40 by Kisstopher707 Comments (0)  


   messageicon Hell hath no fury like a Facebook friend deleted and blocked.
←Rate | 08-13-2013 13:19 by Kisstopher707 Comments (0)  


   messageicon Fellas; If your fiancé designs her own engagement ring, prepare for a life of sex on your birthday and holidays only.
←Rate | 08-10-2013 11:51 by Kisstopher707 Comments (0)  


   messageicon If Internet Explorer has the balls to ask you to set it as your default browser, don’t tell me that you don’t have the guts to ask her out.
←Rate | 07-30-2013 12:59 by Kisstopher707 Comments (0)  


   messageicon Stay in that position I just got a Facebook Notification.
←Rate | 07-26-2013 02:39 by Kisstopher707 Comments (0)  


   messageicon Vodka can be mixed with anything, including more vodka.
←Rate | 07-23-2013 13:11 by Kisstopher707 Comments (0)  


   messageicon Don't litter your chaos and drama all over other people's lives.
←Rate | 07-23-2013 12:54 by Kisstopher707 Comments (0)  


   messageicon My wife said she expects the house to be clean by the time she walks in the door so I changed all of the locks.
←Rate | 07-22-2013 13:05 by Kisstopher707 Comments (0)  


   messageicon Pets are so easy to love. They are honest and react to kindness without wanting to know what's in your bank. Humans could take a lesson.
←Rate | 07-18-2013 14:53 by Kisstopher707 Comments (0)  


   messageicon Hey douchebag. Women like men with an accent, not an Axe scent
←Rate | 07-17-2013 12:53 by Kisstopher707 Comments (0)  


   messageicon My kinda woman has more sex swings than mood swings.
←Rate | 07-16-2013 02:17 by Kisstopher707 Comments (0)  


   messageicon Its already too late for some of you ladies to find Mr Right and I would advise you to just settle for Mr. What's Left or you will die alone.
←Rate | 07-15-2013 15:03 by Kisstopher707 Comments (0)  


   messageicon If you don't hate yourself after it, you haven't eaten enough.
←Rate | 07-12-2013 13:18 by Kisstopher707 Comments (0)  


   messageicon Avoid sharing your alcohol, by surrounding yourself with people that don't drink.
←Rate | 06-27-2013 12:37 by Kisstopher707 Comments (0)  


   messageicon Relationships these days are like birthdays; once the cake is eaten, the party's over!
←Rate | 06-26-2013 06:04 by Kisstopher707 Comments (2)  


   messageicon Facebook keeps offering to find my friends for me. Good luck, Facebook! See if you can find my dad while you're at it.
←Rate | 06-25-2013 13:02 by Kisstopher707 Comments (0)  


   messageicon We have some people struggling with obesity problems, while others are struggling with poverty and starvation. Sh*t like this is why Jesus is not coming back during our lifetime until we get our act together.
←Rate | 06-25-2013 12:53 by Kisstopher707 Comments (0)  


   messageicon I like to welcome visitors to my home with a warm, and sincere 'Goodbye'.
←Rate | 06-19-2013 14:17 by Kisstopher707 Comments (0)  


   messageicon I got 0 problems and denial is one!
←Rate | 06-19-2013 12:16 by Kisstopher707 Comments (0)  




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