huck Funny Status Messages



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   messageicon Anyone who says you can't judge a book by its cover hasn't seen the cover of “The Big Book of Huge Breasts”.
←Rate | 09-13-2012 06:29 by Huck Comments (0)  


   messageicon I'd rather lose an eye than show an old person how to use a computer.
←Rate | 09-09-2012 08:57 by Huck Comments (0)  


   messageicon Worst thing about strip clubs is the women totally hog the poles. Maybe I'm really good! At least give me a turn.
←Rate | 09-06-2012 17:10 by Huck Comments (0)  


   messageicon I got recognized once. It was at my friend's house. He was all, "Hey, you really should call first." So cool.
←Rate | 09-06-2012 17:06 by Huck Comments (0)  


   messageicon On the weekends, I'm a Cupcake War reenactor.
←Rate | 09-06-2012 16:51 by Huck Comments (0)  


   messageicon I'm just a boy. In love with a girl. Standing here quietly. Behind your shower curtain. Watching.
←Rate | 09-06-2012 10:30 by Huck Comments (0)  


   messageicon I am the undefeated champion of this"smooshing-down-the-garbage-so-I-don't-have-to-take-it-out-for-another-day" game
←Rate | 09-06-2012 10:19 by Huck Comments (0)  


   messageicon Just did a weeks worth of cardio after walking into a spider's web.
←Rate | 09-03-2012 07:58 by Huck Comments (0)  


   messageicon Got up at 6am. Did yoga. Had a protein shake. Ran six miles. Started lying about everything.
←Rate | 08-31-2012 06:30 by Huck Comments (0)  


   messageicon I bet if my favorite rock stars saw how hard I rock out & jam to their music they would say "I want to hang out with that dude forever."
←Rate | 08-28-2012 06:20 by Huck Comments (0)  


   messageicon Sitting at a crossroad, strange I don't see Bones, Thug or Harmony
←Rate | 08-25-2012 10:12 by Huck Comments (0)  


   messageicon Across this country right now, college marching bands are practicing call me maybe in time for the kickoff of college football.
←Rate | 08-25-2012 10:11 by Huck Comments (0)  


   messageicon I'm a card carrying member of Card Carriers. I'd show you my card but my hands are full of cards.
←Rate | 08-25-2012 10:09 by Huck Comments (0)  


   messageicon You can tell yourself that Sesame Street is educational but Cookie Monster has lived there for like 40 years and still can't conjugate verbs.
←Rate | 08-23-2012 06:24 by Huck Comments (0)  


   messageicon Helpful hint: You can park wherever you want if you put your hazard lights on and take your tire off.
←Rate | 08-17-2012 07:17 by Huck Comments (0)  


   messageicon Ladies: if a man said he'll fix it, he will. There is no need to remind him every 6 months about it
←Rate | 08-16-2012 06:58 by Huck Comments (0)  


   messageicon You'd think by episode 133 the Scooby Doo gang would know it's a guy in a costume every time.
←Rate | 08-14-2012 05:35 by Huck Comments (0)  


   messageicon Cats are so disgusting it makes them puke.
←Rate | 08-14-2012 05:32 by Huck Comments (0)  


   messageicon I had to take a lie detector test at a job interview once. No I didn't.
←Rate | 08-14-2012 05:30 by Huck Comments (0)  


   messageicon Happy birthday to Sir Mix-A-Lot! People forget how persecuted big butts were before he wrote that song.
←Rate | 08-13-2012 10:20 by Huck Comments (0)  




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