oregon Funny Status Messages



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   messageicon I always start my day off with SNAP, CRACKLE, POP
←Rate | 06-20-2013 14:09 by Oregon Comments (0)  


   messageicon Are you worried your not getting any phone calls? #1 Place cell Phone on silent. #2 Wait about 1 hour you should get at least 10 missed calls. #3 For the heck of it now turn volume to loudest
←Rate | 05-29-2013 14:29 by Oregon Comments (0)  


   messageicon When it's raining I don't work, when its sunny I don't work, when its cloudy I call in sick!
←Rate | 03-11-2013 23:43 by Oregon Comments (0)  


   messageicon Woke up this morning from a dream I was flying. Late to work kind of wished that whole flying thing was true
←Rate | 03-08-2013 18:35 by Oregon Comments (0)  


   messageicon In Florida where you literally get a grave built-in to your house...
←Rate | 03-08-2013 00:12 by Oregon Comments (0)  


   messageicon What is up with all these Government drones? I can't even fly a freaking kite anymore.
←Rate | 03-08-2013 00:05 by Oregon Comments (0)  


   messageicon Subway is not the only one being sued for lying about their length......
←Rate | 01-25-2013 20:53 by oregon Comments (0)  


   messageicon Unemployment is up but so are Michelle Obama's BANGS.....
←Rate | 01-22-2013 23:40 by oregon Comments (0)  


   messageicon Has anyone attempted "The Drive Thru" in reverse??
←Rate | 01-11-2013 20:40 by Oregon Comments (0)  


   messageicon Roses are red, violets are blue... How much do your facebook friends know about you?
←Rate | 01-06-2013 02:12 by oregon Comments (0)  


   messageicon No Microsoft, I don't want to Send an Error Report because I already have a inferiority complex.
←Rate | 01-05-2013 14:34 by oregon Comments (0)  


   messageicon What happened in 2012 stays in 2012...
←Rate | 01-01-2013 14:43 by Oregon Comments (0)  


   messageicon Can they make band aids that are easier and faster to unpack so I don't bleed to death?
←Rate | 12-15-2012 02:05 by oregon Comments (0)  


   messageicon It's beginning to look a lot like 80s on my ATARI 7800 system
←Rate | 12-11-2012 21:41 by Oregon Comments (0)  


   messageicon Dear Santa, Do not eat any cookies from Colorado and Washington this year.. May cause drowsiness.
←Rate | 12-11-2012 00:25 by oregon Comments (0)  


   messageicon Dear Department Store Bathroom Cleaner: Please use less WAX. When I go to the bathroom I am really not in the mood for doing the splits......
←Rate | 11-24-2012 21:38 by Oregon Comments (0)  


   messageicon I went to the store to buy a Hallmark card that says " So sorry you are unemployed and homeless" I am crossing my fingers that you get your house back, sue the bank and never have to work again.
←Rate | 11-20-2012 23:56 by Oregon Comments (0)  


   messageicon Now that a billonaire in Mexico is going to buy out Hostess the twinkie will come in 3 flavors. Hot, Medium and mild.
←Rate | 11-20-2012 20:33 by Oregon Comments (0)  


   messageicon Big bird is now out of "WITNESS PROTECTION"
←Rate | 11-08-2012 23:56 by Oregon Comments (0)  


   messageicon Stopped by the apple store to see if they have a better phone than the Samsung Galaxy S3......ilaughed
←Rate | 08-02-2012 23:49 by Oregon Comments (0)  




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