@TeeWuu86 Funny Status Messages

   Lets play post office... You lick and I'll deliver.

   How do I know that Facebook is a woman? Well a man would never ask "Whats on your mind?" Would he?

   I did not fall! The floor looked sad, so I gave it a hug!!

   Save water... shower with me!

   Bought a CD of ice cream van music.Now I drive with the stereo on full blast, watching the disappointment on all the little kids faces.”

   I never knew what a sweet dream was.... Until I fell asleep thinking about you...”

   Facebook was down for a couple of hours today. Yep. Nine months from now, there's going to be a lot of babies born.

   Remember the first time you were ther leader of the line in kindergarten?........ That was the SHIZNITT!!!!

   How is illegal to talk on phone while driving in new york but its legal for the guy from cash cab to host a television show while driving?

   I call you sunshine.... not because you rise in the am; but because you go down at night.

   I believe in love at first sight....which is exactly why I stopped looking homeless people in the eyes. Just cant risk it.

   Oh, I see you're playing hard to get... I'm gonna play walk away.

   I like It when you smile...................... But I Love It When I'm The Reason.

   I saw a sign outside a church today it said: "The most powerful position, is on your knees..." *naughty thought*

   Two eyebrows are better than one.

   On the road to success, and whoever in my way.............ROADKILL.......

   Why do people feel the need to let everyone know that they are deleting numbers out of their phone........Like I really give a FUGG

   They should make women wear red wrist bands at the club if they're on their period so the fellas will know if she's worth buying drinks for all night

   Show me a man that doesn't cheat and I'll show you a woman who minds her own business

   I love school.......its the quizzes, tests, and homework I cant stand!!