psycho Funny Status Messages



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   messageicon [Jesus at Last Supper] *breaks bread* This is my body *pours wine* This is my blood *opens jar of mayo* Judas: I'm gonna stop you right there
←Rate | 01-31-2015 09:48 by Psycho Comments (0)  


   messageicon You can always tell a lot from that first kiss, especially when they say things like "please stop" and "who are you?"
←Rate | 02-02-2015 12:01 by Psycho Comments (0)  


   messageicon A cop pulled me over this morning but let me go. Maybe these man boobs aren't all bad after all!
←Rate | 02-10-2015 15:48 by Psycho Comments (0)  


   messageicon Free middle fingers for everyone!!!
←Rate | 02-27-2015 00:16 by Psycho Comments (0)  


   messageicon I don't wanna make this weird but that's just kinda how I do things.
←Rate | 03-03-2015 12:23 by Psycho Comments (0)  


   messageicon Sometimes I get road rage standing in lines.
←Rate | 03-06-2015 00:47 by Psycho Comments (0)  


   messageicon I think the hands of time have been molesting me.
←Rate | 03-12-2015 00:34 by Psycho Comments (0)  


   messageicon Any girl is a stripper if you wait outside her window long enough
←Rate | 03-18-2015 00:59 by Psycho Comments (0)  


   messageicon My wife said I couldn't finger paint and also she says that "Paint" is a stupid name for our cat
←Rate | 03-28-2015 13:01 by Psycho Comments (0)  


   messageicon According to my bloodshot eyes I'm not approachable today
←Rate | 03-31-2015 14:03 by Psycho Comments (0)  


   messageicon Its safe to visit my FB page friends. That smell is now gone.
←Rate | 04-04-2015 01:14 by Psycho Comments (0)  


   messageicon *Taps life on shoulder* What's your fcukin problem with me?
←Rate | 04-07-2015 15:02 by Psycho Comments (0)  


   messageicon I don't have any room in my heart for you, but I do have space for you in my trunk.
←Rate | 04-12-2015 14:07 by Psycho Comments (0)  


   messageicon If it wasn't for my excitement to hate someone new I wouldn't leave my bed in the morning.
←Rate | 04-24-2015 02:31 by Psycho Comments (0)  


   messageicon Welcome to Chopped. Your mystery basket ingredients are four of your exes, from which you must create one decent human being.
←Rate | 06-15-2015 13:42 by Psycho Comments (0)  


   messageicon The genie that I rubbed to get my three wishes was not a genie at all. Anyone got bail money?
←Rate | 10-15-2015 15:20 by Psycho Comments (0)  


   messageicon A serial killer, that only targets couples in matching outfits.
←Rate | 10-19-2015 14:12 by Psycho Comments (0)  


   messageicon I bet if I flashed my hand grenade this guy would let me merge
←Rate | 10-25-2015 07:40 by Psycho Comments (0)  


   messageicon Looking for originality her e is like looking for a virgin in a wh0rehouse.
←Rate | 11-05-2015 00:38 by Psycho Comments (0)  


   messageicon Starting my weekend off right with a simmering rage. It's a beautiful day for violence!
←Rate | 11-06-2015 00:01 by Psycho Comments (0)  




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