hihuggiehi Funny Status Messages



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   messageicon When everything else fails... you always have delusion.
←Rate | 10-03-2011 20:48 by hihuggiehi Comments (0)  


   messageicon If I was a ghost on "Ghost Whisperer" the first thing I would ask Jennifer Love Hewitt is "are those real?".
←Rate | 10-09-2011 08:23 by hihuggiehi Comments (0)  


   messageicon When someone says, "I think of you as family," I assume they're gonna scream at me for something that happened 15 years ago.
←Rate | 10-16-2011 19:02 by hihuggiehi Comments (0)  


   messageicon Just found out "Groupons" are just coupons for Grey Poupon. If you try to redeem them for anything else at Walmart you will be arrested.
←Rate | 10-18-2011 17:23 by hihuggiehi Comments (0)  


   messageicon If I were a Kardashian, I would be Kikoo the developmentally disabled one who lives in the pool house and makes designer drool bibs.
←Rate | 10-22-2011 10:03 by hihuggiehi Comments (0)  


   messageicon Twinkle Twinkle little Whore, Close your legs you ain't on Jersey Shore!!!
←Rate | 10-22-2011 15:46 by hihuggiehi Comments (0)  


   messageicon If friends could be bought at the store, I'd have gotten a good deal on mine, because those “slightly irregular” bins are always discounted
←Rate | 10-23-2011 10:20 by hihuggiehi Comments (0)  


   messageicon Money doesn't buy you happiness is just a saying rich people made up to prevent poor people from wanting to rob them.
←Rate | 11-04-2011 19:32 by hihuggiehi Comments (0)  


   messageicon You never see the GEICO Gecko driving a car in any of those commercials. I find that suspicious..
←Rate | 11-04-2011 19:36 by hihuggiehi Comments (0)  


   messageicon My mind and my body are starting to strongly disagree about how old I am.
←Rate | 11-04-2011 19:40 by hihuggiehi Comments (0)  


   messageicon People would probably piss me off a lot less if I was allowed to drive a tank.
←Rate | 11-04-2011 19:42 by hihuggiehi Comments (0)  


   messageicon If people can now use pepper spray to get the last piece of junk at Walmart, then I'm going to start using it for unwanted meeting requests.
←Rate | 11-26-2011 18:38 by hihuggiehi Comments (0)  


   messageicon Don't base your decisions on the advice of people who don't have to deal with the results.
←Rate | 11-26-2011 18:38 by hihuggiehi Comments (0)  


   messageicon If you and your best friend don't have at least one night in your past that you vow to never discuss, you're not best friends.
←Rate | 11-26-2011 18:39 by hihuggiehi Comments (0)  


   messageicon Whenever I set the voice on my GPS to 'Bon Jovi' it just keeps telling me "We're half way there".
←Rate | 11-27-2011 18:35 by hihuggiehi Comments (0)  


   messageicon To get back at the boss for no Christmas bonus, my goal is to rub my balls on everything in his office by New Years. Luckily I started in June.
←Rate | 12-17-2011 18:31 by hihuggiehi Comments (0)  


   messageicon I dropped my laptop in the ocean, So now theres a dell rolling in the deep.
←Rate | 12-17-2011 18:32 by hihuggiehi Comments (0)  


   messageicon Being single is great! Except for the paying for everything yourself part.
←Rate | 12-17-2011 18:32 by hihuggiehi Comments (0)  


   messageicon Life is a comedy for those who think, a tragedy for those who feel, and a pie eating contest for me.
←Rate | 12-17-2011 18:34 by hihuggiehi Comments (0)  


   messageicon Sure it looks like an innocent candy cane now, but give me 5-7 minutes and it'll be a dagger I can take out my enemies with.
←Rate | 12-17-2011 18:35 by hihuggiehi Comments (0)  



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