jeff Funny Status Messages



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   messageicon In this kind of weather I expected to see more boobs hanging out.
←Rate | 06-06-2011 20:56 by jeff Comments (0)  


   messageicon I just read about a dyslexic cop being fired for operating an IUD checkpoint.
←Rate | 08-18-2010 23:05 by Jeff Comments (0)  


   messageicon I always feel like a domestic God after watching Hoarders.
←Rate | 08-22-2010 21:55 by Jeff Comments (0)  


   messageicon Jerry springer say's, "The difference between his guests and politicians are the number of their teeth."
←Rate | 11-01-2010 16:35 by jeff Comments (0)  


   messageicon Man who sneezes without tissue takes matters into own hands.
←Rate | 09-17-2010 20:48 by Jeff Comments (0)  


   messageicon Senior Campbells Soup with.....NEW... larger type alphabet soup letters.
←Rate | 09-14-2010 08:01 by Jeff Comments (0)  


   messageicon I must have drank more than I thought last night...there's an entire hour that I don't remember!
←Rate | 03-13-2016 10:16 by Jeff Comments (0)  


   messageicon In a final selfless gesture, Abe Vigoda will be donating his ear hair to Locks Of Love.
←Rate | 01-26-2016 18:45 by Jeff Comments (0)  


   messageicon Beep...Beep...Beep....Would it be too much to ask for a smoke alarm to warn me of a low battery when the sun is actually up?! Beep...Beep...Beep....
←Rate | 08-17-2010 07:24 by Jeff Comments (0)  


   messageicon 99% of people in this world are stupid, luckily I`m in the other 7%.
←Rate | 05-04-2012 11:03 by Jeff Comments (0)  


   messageicon Cremation..........think outside the box
←Rate | 09-15-2010 12:59 by Jeff Comments (0)  


   messageicon I held the door for a lady at the Post Office because she had a huge box..
←Rate | 08-19-2010 15:20 by Jeff Comments (0)  


   messageicon This other dude at a store just asked me if tulips were annuals or perrinials. I should probably change out of this pink shirt.
←Rate | 05-06-2010 23:21 by Jeff Comments (0)  


   messageicon If whiskey makes you frisky and gin makes you grin, what makes you pregnant? (Two highballs and a Squirt)
←Rate | 09-20-2010 19:43 by Jeff Comments (0)  


   messageicon Cancel my subscription....I am done with your issues!
←Rate | 09-13-2010 13:21 by Jeff Comments (0)  


   messageicon So did anyone ever end up getting Jay-Z a what what?
←Rate | 08-28-2010 12:31 by Jeff Comments (0)  


   messageicon Go to Google, type in "world cup 2010", look at the bottom of the page. Gooooooaaaaaaal!
←Rate | 06-16-2010 22:21 by Jeff Comments (1)  


   messageicon my girlfriend just started smoking. Should I slow down and use a lubricant?
←Rate | 07-28-2010 23:04 by Jeff Comments (0)  


   messageicon My friend Mary joined me for dinner. I had a petite filet and Mary had a little lamb!
←Rate | 03-10-2012 00:24 by Jeff Comments (0)  


   messageicon I'm right 97% of the time...so why does my wife always find fault with the other 4% ?
←Rate | 08-21-2010 17:46 by Jeff Comments (14)  




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