flipphonescott Funny Status Messages



Sort:  Recent   |   Oldest   |   Rating
Filter On | Filter Off | No Trump


Search Messages:
[Clear]

Search results for status messages containing 'flipphonescott': View All Messages
Page: 2 of 7

   messageicon I need to stop lying to myself !!! This bag of Reese cups will never make it to Halloween !
←Rate | 10-15-2015 17:58 by flipphonescott Comments (0)  


   messageicon It's hard to write a good drinking song. I can never make it past the first few bars.
←Rate | 09-11-2012 21:50 by flipphonescott Comments (0)  


   messageicon "As an alternative to dieting, I'm going to simply refer to myself as "value-sized"."
←Rate | 01-14-2012 12:15 by flipphonescott Comments (0)  


   messageicon somedays I could do without the life lesson!
←Rate | 12-15-2014 22:24 by flipphonescott Comments (0)  


   messageicon My bucket list: 4 drumsticks, 2 thighs, 2 mashed potatoes with gravy, and 2 biscuits. Extra crispy
←Rate | 08-05-2014 22:19 by flipphonescott Comments (0)  


   messageicon When gas stations start charging for air--that's inflation
←Rate | 01-13-2012 13:50 by flipphonescott Comments (0)  


   messageicon "There should be a body shop called Auto Correct."
←Rate | 01-12-2012 11:26 by flipphonescott Comments (0)  


   messageicon I haven't gained weight. I'm just retaining cookies.
←Rate | 12-16-2011 02:15 by flipphonescott Comments (0)  


   messageicon When you realize Charles Manson is getting more play than you!
←Rate | 11-17-2014 21:34 by flipphonescott Comments (0)  


   messageicon If you wear cowboy clothes, are you ranch dressing?
←Rate | 08-26-2013 20:22 by flipphonescott Comments (0)  


   messageicon Pretending to be a pleasant person all day is EXHAUSTING!!!
←Rate | 11-29-2011 02:52 by flipphonescott Comments (0)  


   messageicon When you realize winter is still 5 week away!
←Rate | 11-18-2014 21:09 by flipphonescott Comments (0)  


   messageicon They can quit giving me phone books. Just saying
←Rate | 10-15-2015 18:01 by flipphonescott Comments (0)  


   messageicon They should make a Rosetta Stone that helps men understand what the heck women are actually trying to say.
←Rate | 11-26-2011 19:52 by flipphonescott Comments (0)  


   messageicon I am not real pumped up about the Super Bowl this year! ‪
←Rate | 01-27-2015 21:53 by flipphonescott Comments (0)  


   messageicon when you Realize that loud sound in the dryer is your cell phone! DAMMIT!!!!!!!!
←Rate | 01-24-2015 16:48 by flipphonescott Comments (0)  


   messageicon starting the diet on monday or when walgreens runs out of maked down christmas candy
←Rate | 01-05-2012 02:45 by flipphonescott Comments (0)  


   messageicon my new years resolution is to keep my my new years resolution!
←Rate | 12-31-2012 14:48 by flipphonescott Comments (0)  


   messageicon "I never wanted to grow up, I just wanted to be tall enough to reach the cookies
←Rate | 12-09-2011 02:16 by flipphonescott Comments (0)  


   messageicon Call me old school, but cigarettes should not have USB ports
←Rate | 05-03-2014 14:56 by flipphonescott Comments (0)  



[Search Results] [View All Messages]
Submit your own funny facebook status message here:
Name:
Status Message:

... characters left