eaglet1122 Funny Status Messages



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   messageicon I want to tell you about my dream last night. I don't understand it. It was Greek to me....Έχετε λάβει η στιγμή να μεταφράσει αυτό το όνειρο; έχετε ανάγκη από βοήθεια.
←Rate | 06-14-2010 09:32 by eaglet1122 Comments (1)  


   messageicon Facebook Poking Hours: Mon-Friday 7am-10pm Sat 12-11pm Sun Closed
←Rate | 02-21-2011 08:53 by eaglet1122 Comments (0)  


   messageicon My wife is taking my kids to go see the nut cracker this weekend. Of course I'm talking about my mother in law not the show.
←Rate | 12-15-2011 10:29 by eaglet1122 Comments (0)  


   messageicon streaming Netflix's through a Blackberry tandem modem. Please don't call. The good part is coming up!!
←Rate | 09-12-2010 08:01 by eaglet1122 Comments (0)  


   messageicon I think the only people that can use a disposable razor and NOT cut themselves are people that have been to prison!
←Rate | 09-23-2010 10:20 by eaglet1122 Comments (0)  


   messageicon Change is good..especially if you wear diapers!
←Rate | 06-24-2010 10:34 by eaglet1122 Comments (0)  


   messageicon STALKERS meeting tonight at that secret spot! You know the one!!
←Rate | 02-12-2011 17:59 by eaglet1122 Comments (0)  


   messageicon All dyslexics rejoice! For today is your day! 11/11/11 yppaH
←Rate | 11-11-2011 08:47 by eaglet1122 Comments (0)  


   messageicon This whole "Cup half empty, Cup half full" argument should state what is IN the cup before people start judging!!
←Rate | 02-17-2012 16:54 by eaglet1122 Comments (0)  


   messageicon OK, I just throughly cleaned out my truck from being on the road for 2 months working. What did I learn: 1) I should lay off the dollar menu 2) If TV series Hoarders, did a car edition they would ask me to star and 3) I am now getting 7 mpg more with all
←Rate | 01-09-2011 17:59 by eaglet1122 Comments (2)  


   messageicon I literary just saw a chicken cross the road. I want to stop and ask him "Why"?
←Rate | 04-26-2011 18:34 by eaglet1122 Comments (0)  


   messageicon I like how after the dental hygienist rapes my gums with a sharp ass needle the dentist complains how my gums look a little swollen.
←Rate | 10-11-2011 22:19 by eaglet1122 Comments (0)  


   messageicon I dream in High Definition.
←Rate | 06-05-2011 10:59 by eaglet1122 Comments (0)  


   messageicon Last women I hooked up with at the retirement home told me, "If you break it you buy it"! You know what that hip replacement cost me??
←Rate | 10-28-2010 20:14 by eaglet1122 Comments (0)  


   messageicon Doughboy is survived by his wife Play Dough, three children: John Dough, Jane Dough and Dosey Dough, plus they had one in the oven. He is also survived by his elderly father, Pop Tart. The funeral was held at 3:50 for about 20 minutes.
←Rate | 02-03-2011 16:32 by eaglet1122 Comments (0)  


   messageicon Should I still call a DR if I have a have an erection for more then 4 hrs but I have not taken anything???
←Rate | 05-01-2011 21:14 by eaglet1122 Comments (0)  


   messageicon What's the over under on how many times the Bodyguard is on the next few weeks??
←Rate | 02-11-2012 21:45 by eaglet1122 Comments (0)  


   messageicon Ah, the patter of little feet around the house. There is nothing like having a midget for a butler.
←Rate | 01-31-2012 20:13 by eaglet1122 Comments (0)  


   messageicon We all have a devil and an angel on our shoulders. Only problem is my devil has a gym membership!
←Rate | 03-21-2011 19:11 by eaglet1122 Comments (0)  


   messageicon #1-900 I used to like to talk to you on late Friday nights when all my friends were out with their girls. Then you went and raise your rates!
←Rate | 12-09-2010 09:36 by eaglet1122 Comments (0)  



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