Gil Funny Status Messages



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   messageicon Living alone means never having to close the bathroom door or having to spray air freshener when you're done.
←Rate | 07-29-2013 10:08 by gil Comments (0)  


   messageicon Jell-O: Doubling the global demand for supply of Vodka since 1923
←Rate | 05-09-2011 03:32 by Gil Comments (0)  


   messageicon Roses are Red, Violets are Blue, some poems rhyme, others don't
←Rate | 02-14-2011 17:51 by Gil Comments (0)  


   messageicon What do you get when you cross an atheist with a Jehovahs Witness?…. Someone who knocks at your door for no apparent reason.
←Rate | 01-20-2011 14:42 by Gil Comments (1)  


   messageicon HPAPY ST PTARCIK'S DYA. Kiss me, I'm drunkish!
←Rate | 03-17-2011 07:53 by Gil Comments (0)  


   messageicon Really smart Jehovah witnesses follow the FedEx Truck and pizza delivery man on Saturdays.
←Rate | 09-09-2013 20:21 by Gil Comments (0)  


   messageicon If Hillary gets elected, Bill will be the ugliest first lady ever.
←Rate | 05-09-2016 10:51 by Gil Comments (0)  


   messageicon Dear Kardashians, your 15 minutes was up a few months ago...
←Rate | 12-24-2010 20:48 by Gil Comments (0)  


   messageicon When is it a good time to mention the Easter holiday tradition of eggs and bunny rabbits are pagan fertility symbols and the words Easter, Easter Bunny, or Easter Egg appear nowhere in the Bible? Not this weekend then?.....
←Rate | 04-07-2012 15:49 by gil Comments (4)  


   messageicon I was walking down the street and saw my Arab friend shaking a rug on his porch. I shouted out to him "What's wrong Ahmed, won't start?"
←Rate | 06-04-2011 13:05 by Gil Comments (0)  


   messageicon After hearing the news that an AirFrance jumbojet clipped a Delta Airlines plane, France immediately surrendered.
←Rate | 04-12-2011 18:47 by Gil Comments (0)  


   messageicon Congrats Google Plus on being the new Myspace replacement. RIP facebook
←Rate | 09-22-2011 14:44 by Gil Comments (0)  


   messageicon Dating websites should model themselves after facebook, with an ugly button.
←Rate | 01-19-2011 23:36 by Gil Comments (0)  


   messageicon I was abducted by aliens once, but after a couple hours the Mexican landscapers let me go.
←Rate | 09-29-2017 14:38 by Gil Comments (0)  


   messageicon COPD is deadly and no one likes dealing with it, whether you are referring to Chronic Obstructive Pulmonary Disease, or the Commission On Presidential Debates.
←Rate | 09-26-2016 19:26 by Gil Comments (0)  


   messageicon I think during every government shut-down, we should declare a Purge, just like in the movie.
←Rate | 10-01-2013 12:33 by gil Comments (0)  


   messageicon only 4 more days before you all make resolutions you won't keep anyway
←Rate | 12-27-2010 08:25 by Gil Comments (0)  


   messageicon Religion and morality don't need each other to exist.
←Rate | 03-01-2012 10:31 by Gil Comments (1)  


   messageicon "If I had a communicable disease, it would look just like Ebola" - Barack Obama
←Rate | 10-15-2014 19:12 by gil Comments (0)  


   messageicon Only 33 days until the end of the world. Why is everyone acting so normal?
←Rate | 11-09-2012 12:31 by gil Comments (0)  



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