hihuggiehi Funny Status Messages



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   messageicon At the young age of 5, a bear told me that I am the only person who can prevent forest fires. Why I was chosen, I'll never know.
←Rate | 01-08-2012 08:03 by hihuggiehi Comments (0)  


   messageicon If you think paper beats rock, please hold this piece of paper in front of your face for a second…
←Rate | 01-04-2012 17:31 by hihuggiehi Comments (0)  


   messageicon They're coming out with a line of Kardashian Barbie Dolls. As if the actual Kardashians aren't fake enough.
←Rate | 01-04-2012 17:27 by hihuggiehi Comments (0)  


   messageicon One politician endorsing another is like poo endorsing diarrhea.
←Rate | 01-04-2012 17:27 by hihuggiehi Comments (0)  


   messageicon Before you make up your mind, open it.
←Rate | 01-04-2012 17:26 by hihuggiehi Comments (0)  


   messageicon My doctor drums up business by refusing to refill my prescriptions until I come in to sit in their waiting room full of people with the flu.
←Rate | 01-04-2012 05:06 by hihuggiehi Comments (0)  


   messageicon When I'm drunk I just hit any buttons and put my faith in autocorrect.
←Rate | 01-04-2012 05:05 by hihuggiehi Comments (0)  


   messageicon If my calculations are correct then someone else did them for me.
←Rate | 01-04-2012 05:05 by hihuggiehi Comments (0)  


   messageicon just took crocs off a man sleeping in the airport & threw them in the trash because it was the right thing to do
←Rate | 01-04-2012 05:04 by hihuggiehi Comments (0)  


   messageicon Of everything I've ever accomplished in my life, I'm most proud of the fact that I've never seen an episode of Jersey Shore.
←Rate | 01-04-2012 05:03 by hihuggiehi Comments (0)  


   messageicon The adult version of Operation is trying not to break a tortilla chip while dipping it into a jar of salsa.
←Rate | 01-04-2012 05:03 by hihuggiehi Comments (0)  


   messageicon I'm starting to think I'll never be old enough to know better.
←Rate | 01-03-2012 04:52 by hihuggiehi Comments (0)  


   messageicon Katy Perry kissed a guy that looks like a girl and apparently didn't like it.
←Rate | 01-03-2012 04:51 by hihuggiehi Comments (0)  


   messageicon You can tell Monopoly is an old game because there's a luxury tax and rich people can go to jail.
←Rate | 01-03-2012 04:50 by hihuggiehi Comments (0)  


   messageicon I think all Walmart bathrooms are required by law to look like the set of one of the "Saw" movies.
←Rate | 01-03-2012 04:48 by hihuggiehi Comments (0)  


   messageicon Doesn't seem like a good sign that I asked for a to-go box at this Mexican restaurant, and they brought me a casket.
←Rate | 01-03-2012 04:47 by hihuggiehi Comments (0)  


   messageicon The only people who still leave voicemail messages are bill collectors and moms.
←Rate | 01-03-2012 04:45 by hihuggiehi Comments (0)  


   messageicon I sleep better naked…why can't the flight attendant understand this?
←Rate | 01-01-2012 18:54 by hihuggiehi Comments (0)  


   messageicon The difference between genius and stupidity is that genius has its limits.
←Rate | 01-01-2012 18:53 by hihuggiehi Comments (0)  


   messageicon If everyone "resolves" to not care about the Kardashians in 2012 do you think they'll go away?
←Rate | 01-01-2012 18:17 by hihuggiehi Comments (0)  




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