Eddy Funny Status Messages



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   messageicon parents are hypocritical.....your not supposed to take candy or food from strangers but what do they let you do every Halloween? not supposed to talk to strangers but every christmas they sit you on santa's lap so you can talk to him.
←Rate | 02-20-2012 04:04 by Eddy Comments (0)  


   messageicon nobody likes a stalker. it's what this chick was saying as I read her lips through my binoculars
←Rate | 02-19-2012 21:55 by Eddy Comments (0)  


   messageicon i'm thinking of becoming a gynecologist....i hear there's plenty of openings
←Rate | 02-16-2012 23:23 by Eddy Comments (0)  


   messageicon brains are like modems....some people can think fast like they are high speed internet....some ppl are slow thinkers like they are dial-up....other ppl have lost connection
←Rate | 02-16-2012 21:11 by Eddy Comments (0)  


   messageicon 1 day i'm gonna be telling my kids about payphones, no cell phones or internet & the video games aren't portable....& the kids will think it's a fairy tale
←Rate | 02-16-2012 04:09 by Eddy Comments (0)  


   messageicon when the police were doing the chalk outline of Whitney Houston's body, her spirit rose up & tried to snort it
←Rate | 02-15-2012 22:42 by Eddy Comments (0)  


   messageicon all that Tebowing didnt even get him into the super bowl
←Rate | 02-05-2012 22:25 by Eddy Comments (0)  


   messageicon a parent should never name the kid "Lana"...just in case the kid becomes dyslexic
←Rate | 02-01-2012 03:55 by Eddy Comments (0)  


   messageicon biggest lie women tell: be honest, I wont get mad
←Rate | 01-25-2012 05:11 by Eddy Comments (0)  


   messageicon thought about being a gynecologist...i hear there's plenty of openings
←Rate | 01-13-2012 04:30 by Eddy Comments (0)  


   messageicon i have all the right answers ...you just ask the wrong questions
←Rate | 01-12-2012 00:58 by Eddy Comments (0)  


   messageicon why is it when you go to a restaurant their radio is never playing the song "ding, fries are done" from family guy?...seems like a catchy tune for a restaurant
←Rate | 01-11-2012 18:10 by Eddy Comments (0)  


   messageicon if you act like a douche i'm gonna call you "eve"
←Rate | 01-10-2012 05:05 by Eddy Comments (0)  


   messageicon you never see the chihuahua in the Taco Bell commercials anymore...makes me wonder what's in those 99 cent burritos
←Rate | 01-04-2012 23:27 by Eddy Comments (0)  


   messageicon I missed my ex today so I reloaded & shot again
←Rate | 01-04-2012 22:58 by Eddy Comments (0)  


   messageicon I bet there was a lot of red solo cups used last night
←Rate | 01-01-2012 18:30 by Eddy Comments (0)  


   messageicon when you get gifts, people say "its the thought that counts"...my cousin got me deodorant...does she think I smell bad?
←Rate | 12-26-2011 00:17 by Eddy Comments (0)  


   messageicon 364 shopping days left
←Rate | 12-26-2011 00:13 by Eddy Comments (0)  


   messageicon santa has to be the greatest criminal ever...a million cases of breaking & entering...the police everywhere know where he lives but he knows how to buy everyone of them off with gifts
←Rate | 12-23-2011 20:24 by Eddy Comments (0)  


   messageicon Bought my son an iPad, my daughter an iPod. The wife got me an iPhone and I got her an iRon. She wasn't overjoyed even after I explained that it can be integrated with the iWash, iCook, iClean network. This activated the iNag software update
←Rate | 12-22-2011 13:31 by Eddy Comments (0)  


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